Bigger Fatter Liar Page #4

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I'll give you two.

My parents.

They'll never say yes to this.

So lie.

Mom? Dad?

There's something

I have to tell you.

I've decided I want

to go to Yoga Camp.

How's the new phone?

Perfect. Thanks, Dad.

Highcroft Electronics, please.

There he is.

Yo. Hansel and Gretel.

Where do you think you're going?

We're here to see Larry Wolf.

Uh-huh.

Got an appointment?

Not exactly, but he's going

to want to talk to me.

Oh, yeah.

I'm sure he's been dreaming

of this his whole life.

Look, Jimmy, we've come a very

long way for this meeting.

I would suggest you just call upstairs and

let him know that Kevin Shepard is here.

Hi, Mr. Wolf?

It's Jimmy in the lobby.

I was hoping to get fired

today for bothering you

about a couple of snotty kids

who don't have an appointment.

On second thought,

I'll keep my job.

Buh-bye.

Now what?

Be right back.

Go on up.

Mmm, go on up.

Yeah, go on up.

Bigger Fatter Liar.

Oh... It's not supposed

to do that, sir.

It's not supposed to freeze

in the middle of the game?

I had no idea...

You're such an idiot!

It's still got a few bugs, but

I'm sure once we get it up and running,

you won't be able

to put it down, Mr. Wolf.

No, no, I doubt that.

I do not play video games.

Video games are for losers

with nothing better to do.

Uh...

Excuse me, Mr. Wolf?

Hmm?

If you don't like the games, why are

you running the Interactive division?

Well, let me ask

you something, Connie.

It's Kenny, sir.

Yeah, whatever.

Do you think that

I like microwave ovens?

No, I don't.

Microwave ovens cook like crap,

and they don't even get

the popcorn setting correct.

But I spent five years

in appliances.

Five long years.

I pioneered convection-roasting

technology.

I introduced the

FridgeMate TV system.

I tripled the revenue

for that department.

I was a shoo-in to be

president of this company.

Top-floor office.

Big pay raise.

A view.

You have a wonderful view, sir.

Oh, yeah? Really?

Look at this.

Oh.

Exactly.

I've worked for this

company for 30 years.

I deserved to be president.

They owed it to me. But what

did Old Man Highcroft do?

He gave the job to his grandson.

His idiot grandson!

I meant to say that.

Now, you listen to me.

I'm going to work you morons

like rented monkeys

until I turn this turd of a

department into a winner.

Then I'm going to show them who

should be president of this company!

Capisce?

Yup.

Hmm.

Wait here.

I'm sorry. Mr. Wolf is

in a meeting right now.

He's going to have

to call you back.

Delivery for Mr. Wolf.

Thank you. You can just

put that right there.

Sorry. This is

a special order.

Mr. Wolf asked for this

to be hand-delivered to him.

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