Bellflower Page #4

those Dixie cups. Okay.

And then put it

underneath the spout.

Okay.

And turn on the passenger seat

heat to pressurize the system.

Okay. And then it just works

by pressing the button.

Oh, my God.

What is it?

Does it look weird? It's

whiskey. No. Oh, my God.

Yeah.

Is it awesome?

Is it safe?

It's totally safe.

Aaah!

Dude, it's like...

It's like a James Bond car

for drunks.

So, you, like, built this?

Yes. Yes.

Okay.

It's, like, a hobby, I guess.

Okay. So tell me

about the flamethrower then.

Ah, the flamethrower.

So when me and Aiden

were kids in Wisconsin,

we saw Mad Max on TV.

Yep.

We recorded it

on a V.H.S. Tape...

and watched it,

like, a hundred times.

Totally.

And then our minds got warped,

and we decided that we

absolutely had to have...

our own flamethrower...

and, like, a Mad Max muscle car

that shoots flames out...

and has an engine sticking out

of the hood and is really scary.

And... Thank you.

And then, if and when the

apocalypse happens... Right.

We're set up to rule

over the wasteland...

with our gang Mother Medusa.

You know Mad Max, right?

Yes, I know Mad Max.

Come on.

Okay. Sorry.

I think I usually tell it better...

so I seem cool.

No. That was perfect

to make you seem really cool.

Okay, good.

I expect to become

an honorary member someday.

We could probably

work something out.

A Medusa, if you will.

Yes.

Yeah?

Yeah, we'll see.

Nice.

Oh.

For you.

Awesome.

And for me.

Woodrow?

#If you grew up with white boys #

# Who only look

at black and Puerto Rican porno #

# 'Cause they want something

that their dad don't got #

# Then you know where you're at #

#Mortaring your ear holes shut

in a rush with wet coke #

#In a Starbucks bathroom

with the door closed #

#On booze,

I'm left in residue and confused #

#Like the first time

you used soft water down... ##

Oh, sh*t.

I need a shot

to deal with this.

Here's a little one for you.

Uh... Oh, my God!

This is huge.

Cheers.

Well?

Check this out.

I'm scared.

That's good. You've done your job.

Do you see this?

What, the railroad special?

Yeah. Served all night.

And day-old meat loaf.

That's not half bad at

all. Well, well, well.

Look who got dipped

in the pretty sauce.

Did he just grab your ass?

Yes. That's fine.

Wait. Hold on a second.

No.

Hey, buddy,

you gonna apologize

to her for that?

- Why don't you take it easy, buddy?

- Dude...

Hey, I don't think

you're listening to me.

I'm dead serious

when I'm telling you right now,

I will beat the living

f***ing sh*t out of you...

if you don't apologize

to her right now.

Woodrow, let's go, seriously.

Holy sh*t.

I was the one

that was supposed to get sick.

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