Batman Returns

- Merry Christmas.

- Merry Christmas.

Penguin sighting! Man or myth?

What is he? Today's edition.

Another penguin sighting.

Another penguin sighting! Check it out!

Penguin man living in Gotham's sewers!

Read all about the latest sighting!

May I have your attention, Gotham City?

It is time for tonight's lighting of the tree.

How about that?

Part man, part penguin! All horrifying!

Find out for only 50 cents! Come on!

Read about the possible terror

beneath our feet! Check it out!

Read about it!

Missing link between man and bird.

My dear boy...

...sometimes it's a diversion

to read such rubbish.

Usually, it's a waste of time.

Whatever. Today's issue!

"The Penguin:
Man or myth?"

The Globe! Right here! 25 cents!

Well, here's hoping.

With luck, Gotham will have its first

merry Christmas in years.

I feel almost vulgar at Yuletide...

...mentioning the new power plant.

But if we're to break ground

when we must, I'll need permits...

...variances, tax incentives.

That sort of pesky nonsense.

Power plant?

Studies show we've enough power to get

us into the middle of the next century.

Your analysts foresee growth

at 1% per annum. That's a mild swelling.

Imagine...

...a Gotham City...

...of the future, lit up like a blanket

of stars...

...but blinking on and off...

...embarrassingly low on juice.

Frankly...

...I cringe, Mr. Mayor.

Sorry, any plans must go

to the usual committees...

...through the usual channels.

I have a suggestion.

Well...

...actually, really, just more like a question.

I'm afraid we haven't

properly housebroken Ms. Kyle.

In the plus column, though...

...she makes great coffee.

Dad.

Mr. Mayor. Time to go down

and bring joy to the masses.

"Actually, more of a question."

You stupid corn dog.

Corn dog, corn dog.

I have enough signatures

from Shreck employees to warrant a recall.

That's not a threat, just simple numbers.

Maybe. But you sure as hell

don't have an issue or a candidate.

Thank you, ladies and gentlemen.

From those of us at City Hall

to each and every one of you...

...happy holidays.

We have with us a man who needs

no introduction, he's given us so much.

Please welcome Gotham's

own Santa Claus, Max Shreck.

Pick up those contracts for Personnel and...

...pick up the dry cleaning

and paper towels...

Darn!

I forgot my speech.

Remind me to take it out

on what's-her-name.

Santa Claus?

Afraid not.

I'm just a poor schmo. Got lucky.

Sue me...

...if I want to give some back.

I only wish I could hand out more

than just...

...expensive baubles.

I wish I could hand out world peace...

...and unconditional love...

...wrapped in a big bow.

Oh, but you can.

Oh, but you will.

Merry Christmas.

Great idea.

Not mine.

What are you waiting for? The signal!

We want the big guy!

The guy who runs the show!

What do you want?

Not you!

Shreck!

You'll have to go through me.

Dad, go! Save yourself!

Dad, go!

Shut up!

Take one step closer, Mr. Manbat, and I'll...

You missed.

The Batman.

Or is it just "Batman"?

Your choice, of course.

Well, that was...

...very brief.

Just like all the men in my life.

What men?

Well...

...then again, there's you.

But you need therapy.

Thanks for saving the day, Batman.

The Circus Gang is back.

We'll see.

They almost made off with our mover

and shaker, Max Shreck.

Where is that insufferable son of a bitch?

I believe the word you're looking for is...

Actually, this is all just a bad dream.

You're at home in bed...

...heavily sedated, resting comfortably...

...dying from the carcinogens

you've personally spewed...

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