Barely Legal

---

1

So, girls, what are we gonna do

for our birthday?

Sue, we have plenty of time.

To figure something out.

But this is the big 1... 8.

I mean, every year since our moms

met in the hospital,

We've done something new

and special,

But this has to be newer

and more special.

So what's something

we've never done before?

- Mushrooms?

- No, not like that.

Like something nice.

- Like maybe a trip.

- Like a mushroom trip?

No.

Sorry, Sue. I have a date.

So do I. Sorry, Sue.

Don't worry, Sue.

We'll figure it out.

- Oh, flowers. Are these from you?

- Yeah. Sure.

Here you go.

No card? But I thought I saw one.

I didn't know

how to put my feelings into words.

I guess, um...

You still make me...

Nervous.

Oh, Jake.

Maybe I should come in

and hang out for a minute.

Uh, no, Jake. Not yet.

When we do it,

I want it to be really special,

- The best night of my life.

- It will be, I promise.

It'll always be amazing.

With you and me together.

Jake, no. I have to go.

I have to work on my art project.

You know, I thought art was

gonna be a really easy elective,

But guess I should have

taken more math. Heh.

Uh, so you're gonna come

to my birthday, okay?

- This saturday?

- Of course.

Thanks.

Okay, bye.

Not bad.

- Hello.

- Cheryl,

we have to talk about

our birthday plans.

I mean, it's only two days away,

and we still haven't decided

the perfect way to celebrate.

So I was thinking

maybe we could all take a trip to...

Oh, Sue, um,

I meant to tell you before,

But I wanted to be sure.

Um, I think I'm gonna spend

my birthday with jake.

Uh, I'm gonna lose my virginity to him.

You know, I want to surprise him.

What? But you can't.

I mean, I thought we were

going to wait until marriage.

Besides, you can't do that to us.

You can't break tradition that way.

This is bad.

You know, I'm gonna tell Lexi.

She's gonna be very unhappy

about this.

Come on, Lexi.

Oh, baby, you're so hot.

- I'm gonna do you so good.

- Oh, yeah, baby?

- Yeah.

- What was your name again?

Rod, sex god.

That's right.

That's the body of a real man.

Oh, sorry. I just gotta get my phone.

Oh, it's an sos from Sue. Hold on.

My contacts.

Go time.

No. Wait.

I need to find my contacts.

They're in here somewhere.

- Oh, there's one.

- Nipple.

- Sorry.

- I didn't say stop, though.

Hit them both.

Oh, hey.

It's my buddy JJ. Is that cool?

Oh. Uh, uh... okay. I guess.

As long as you told him

I'm still a virgin, So no fucking.

Oh.

Oh.

Lexi is so upset, she's speechless.

Yeah, right. I bet.

Oh, my gosh.

Bye.

Oh, my gosh.

Five orgasms in a row.

Oh, there's my contact.

Cheryl's losing her virginity

on saturday?

Oh, no.

Does not compute.

Want to talk...

- In person...

- Asap.

- Oh.

- Huh. I Hi.

So when did you get home?

- So is it true?

- Yes, it is.

It's just it's the right time,

And jake's the right man.

I mean, he's handsome

and smart and wealthy,

And he has a really bright future

ahead of him,

So I just think it's the right time.

Lexi, tell her.

Losing our virginity

is one of those milestones.

We all have to face together.

On our birthday, yes,

but not on this birthday.

Like maybe on our 23rd birthday

Or maybe even like our twenty... Ni...

Eighth, maybe.

Listen, guys, um, I know it's tradition,

but sorry.

But, Cheryl, sue is right.

We do always do something special

on our birthda...

Does Jake really have Such a tiny,

little needle dick?

It's not Jake.

It's the male ideal,

Like a greek god or sue's dad.

Right.

Yeah, I guess you're right.

I mean, it kinda sucks.

I'm not really an artist.

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