Bader Zamalano the show. pilot

Season #1 Episode #1

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FADE IN:

INT. BADER'S KITCHEN - MORNING

Bader (age 9) is making oatmeal for his little sister Shaikha (age 1) while his older brother Slim Z (age 14) and babysitters Annie Baltic (age 22) and Caleb Reynolds (age 23) are having breakfast.

CALEB REYNOLDS:
(looking at Shaikha's oatmeal)

Bader, why is the oatmeal lumpy?

SLIM Z:
Yeah, it looks gross.

BADER:
(defensively)

I didn't mean to make it lumpy.

ANNIE BALTIC:
(reassuringly)

It's okay, Bader. Shaikha doesn't have to eat it if she doesn't want to.

CALEB REYNOLDS:
(grimacing)

But we can't throw it away. That's 30 cents worth of oatmeal.

ANNIE BALTIC:
(smiling)

Well, we can always give it to Bader.

Bader looks defeated as Caleb Reynolds chuckles to himself.

BADER:
my babysitter Caleb Reynolds always knew The price of everything.

[montage:
]

CALEB REYNOLDS:
[retrieving a chicken wing from the trash] That's $1.09 in the trash.

CALEB REYNOLDS:
[next to a tray of burnt biscuits] That's $2 on fire.

CALEB REYNOLDS:
That's 49 cents of spilled milk dripping all over my table. Somebody's gonna drink this milk.

INT. OUTSIDE - DAY

ANNIE:
If I ever catch any of y'all spray painting on anybody's wall, I'm gonna put my foot so far up your behind, you'll have toes for teeth. Get inside.

BADER:
[v.o.] That's my Other babysitter and Caleb Reynolds’s girlfriend Annie Baltic Rochelle. She had a hundred recipes for whooping butt

[montage:
]

ANNIE:
Boy, I will slap the caps off your knees.

ANNIE:
I will knock you into last night.

ANNIE:
I will slap your name out the phonebook and call Ma Bell and tell her I did it.

CUT TO:

INT. BADER'S LIVING ROOM - LATER

Caleb Reynolds is looking through bills while Annie Baltic is playing with Shaikha.

CALEB REYNOLDS:
(confused)

Annie, why did you only pay half of these bills?

ANNIE BALTIC:
(offended)

Excuse me, Caleb, but I have been trying my best to keep up with everything. I don't need you questioning my ability to do my job.

CALEB REYNOLDS;(agrees)

Okay, fine. You do it your way. But I'm going to pay them my way and see if that works out better.

ANNIE BALTIC:
(rolling her eyes)

Suit yourself. And slim z if you come home from school take care of your sister

SLIM Z:
ugh fine

BADER:
[v.o.] Since my older brother slim z was the oldest, he had to be the emergency adult.

[montage:
]

CALEB REYNOLDS:
If you smell smoke, and you think the house is gonna catch fire, get your brother and your sister and get out of here.

CALEB REYNOLDS:
If you smell gas and you think the house is gonna blow up, get your brother and your sister and get out of here.

CALEB REYNOLDS:
If you smell smoke, and your brother catches on fire, get your sister and get out of here.

BADER:
[v.o.] Fortunately, the house never caught fire and neither did my i.

CUT TO:

INT. BADER'S BEDROOM - MORNING

Bader is getting dressed for school but is disappointed to find that he has to wear Slim Z's hand-me-down smart shoes instead of his own cool sneakers.

BADER:
(sighing)

These shoes are so lame.

CUT TO:

INT. BUS STOP - DAY

Bader is waiting for the bus while reading the newspaper.

BADER:
(excitedly)

I learned more on the way to school than I learned at school.

CUT TO:

INT. SCHOOL HALLWAY - DAY

Bader runs into the school bully, Tashi Anderson.

TASHI ANDERSON:
(teasingly)

Nice shoes, Bojangles.

BADER:
(trying to outdo her)

Bojangles? That’s not what your mom said after I was tap dancing in her drawers last night.

Tashi walks to bader

TASHI ANDERSON:
What

BADER:
Did I stutter?

Tashi punches Bader, causing him to fall into the new Principal.

PRINCIPAL:
(sternly)

What on earth is going on here?

TASHI ANDERSON:
(defiantly)

Nothing.

BADER:
(explaining)

She punched me because I accidentally stepped on her foot.

PRINCIPAL:
(warningly)

I don't want to hear about any more trouble from either of you. Behave yourselves.

TASHI ANDERSON:
(threateningly)

You'll get it after school, shrimp.

Suddenly, another student, Chris (10), walks by. Tashi steps on his shoe, scuffing it.

CHRIS:
(angry)Hey, watch it!

TASHI:
(faking innocence)Oops, sorry. Didn’t see you there, Blackie.

Chris punches Tashi, causing her to bump into the new principal.

PRINCIPAL:
(angry)What’s going on here?!

TASHI:
(sobbing)He hit me!

Bader looks in shock as the kids get told off and warned to behave. Tashi, however, is still not done with Chris.

TASHI:
(to Chris)This isn’t over, (N-word).

The N-word is bleeped out, and Bader narrates:

BADER:
(V.O.)Oh, she got away with calling him the N-word that day, but later in life she said it at a DMX concert and almost got stomped to death.

Bader reunites with his best friends, Everleigh LaBrant (age 10) and Caleb Johnston (age 11).

EVERLEIGH LABRANT:(excitedly)

Bader, what happened?

CALEB J:
(teasingly)

Did you get beat up by a girl?

BADER:
(frowning)

It was Tashi. And, no, I didn't get beat up.

EVERLEIGH LABRANT:(curiously)

What happened to the old Principal?

BADER:
(NARRATING)

(Mystically)

Mr Palmer was accused of doing something that we can't tell you about because of the network censors.

CUT TO:

INT. PIZZA RESTAURANT - LUNCHTIME

Bader, Everleigh, and Caleb are seen enjoying a slice of pizza.

EVERLEIGH:
(teasingly)

Bader, you should've stayed away from Tashi. You know she's trouble.

CALEB J:
(grinning)

Yeah, maybe next time you'll think twice before trying to 'out-black' her.

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