Bad Turn Worse

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You know, I should've got

biscuits and gravy.

I mean, technically

it's just biscuit and gravy.

'Cause it's just one biscuit

cut in half, see?

No...

even if it is just one biscuit,

it's still biscuits and gravy.

You know, how like one pair

of pants still pants.

I mean, you might want to take it

with the Whataburger folks,

because they're selling it

as biscuit and gravy, see?

Yeah, that... that doesn't

make it right. I mean...

What would you call bacon and eggs

if you only got one egg?

- I would call it bacon and egg.

- No, you would not.

You would call it bacon and eggs.

Anybody would.

- Nobody would say, I'll have bacon and egg.

- They would if there was only one egg.

You know, goddamn,

the hell you wouldn't.

Here. You should read this.

You'd like it.

I don't know, I still haven't read

the book you gave me last week,

or the one from the week before that.

I mean, you know, I don't read like you do.

Sh*t, I don't know anybody

that reads like you.

Well, in college, everybody reads

like me, so you better get used to it.

Well, then I guess

I got a few weeks still.

And I bet they don't even read

like you either, even in college.

You know, besides, my mom sees

anymore books around the house,

she's going to have to really believe

I'm leaving. Just might kill her.

You know what, forget about those two.

Read this one, you'll like it.

- It happens right here.

- What, in a Whataburger?

No, jackass, in Texas.

Jim Johnson was a Texas boy. Well, I mean,

technically, he was born in Oklahoma,

but all this stuff happens

right here in Texas.

- You know what Jim Thompson said?

- What did he say?

He said, there are thirty-two ways to tell

a story, but there's only ever one plot.

- Yeah, what's that?

- That things are not what they seem.

Well, I will sure as sh*t

go along with that.

Things are most definitely

not what they seem.

- You know, not around here, anyhow.

- How's that?

Well, there's... there's you,

for example.

- I'm not what I seem?

- No, you're definitely not.

Because you go

and you put on your coveralls,

and you fix tractors all day.

But then you go home,

and you read all these books,

and you know things. Like how...

how there's thirty-two ways to tell

a story, but there's only one plot.

I didn't say that.

Jim Thomson said that.

No, yeah, I know, but you...

you know, you know it.

You know all kinds of other stuff, too.

What's my girl know?

- Hey.

- Hey, baby, how're you?

Oh, sh*t, biscuits and gravy.

I love this stuff.

You know, it's actually just called

biscuit and gravy, right?

What?

Hey, Sue was just telling me

about this guy, wrote this book here.

He said there was thirty-two ways

to tell a story.

- That right? I did not know that.

- Yeah.

Of course, I ain't the one

heading off to college like you two.

BJ, you should read this.

I think you'd like it.

Yeah, happens right here, in Texas.

Then what I need to read it for?

Sh*t, I already know every goddamn thing

- that happens in Texas.

- That's true.

- I just thought you'd like it, is all.

- I want to read it.

Okay.

You know, course we could sit here

and talk about books.

Or...

go over to Corpus, have the best goddamn

going away party we ever had.

I don't know, BJ.

Now, I haven't got the money for that.

And besides, me and you got to be

at Giff's tomorrow morning.

No, I don't have any money

to be going out either.

Now... I just might be able to do

a little something about that.

- Jesus Christ, where did you get that?

- I've been saving, man.

Ever since I found out that my best girl

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