Bad Asses

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- Stand up, asshole.

- I don't want any trouble. Leave me alone.

I can kick your ass while you're

sitting down or standing up. It's your call.

- F*ck his shit up, Raymond.

- Yeah.

You might

remember him as Bad Ass,

the bearded hero who

stood up for an elderly

gentleman on an S.C.

Transit bus...

and became an overnight

Internet sensation.

Because of his heroic

efforts, Vega was made

an honorary police

officer this morning.

Mmm. Mmm.

Oh, God, you're better than

an alarm clock, Baxter.

Mmm. Good boy. Good boy.

Good boy. Okay,

okay, okay, okay.

Enough kisses.

Ay, yi, yi, yi, yi!

Goddamn.

Hey, okay!

Cut the crap out, boy.

No need to get your nuts in my face.

Damn.

You know what? There's a

pharmacy two doors down.

They started selling hearing aids.

You oughta get yourself some.

Having a sale this

week on Depends.

Your chance to stock up so

you don't crap yourself.

Wow, Bernie. That's the nicest thing

you've said to me in three years.

Yeah. You goddamn welcome. Shit.

Stay in the middle.

That's it.

Watch it. There we go.

Right there.

Defense! Defense! That's it.

That's it.

Stay up there. That's it.

That's it.

Let's go. Let's go to the body now.

Come on.

Do some body work.

Do some body work.

Let's go! Body!

Body. That's it. That's it.

That's it.

That's it. Okay.

All right, Manny. Two jabs and a right

hand. Two jabs and a right hand.

Oh! Oh, shit.

Damn, Manny.

You tore his head off.

Salts.

Jesus Christ, Frank. I'm sorry.

Come on.

Come on, Raymond. Hey!

Is he all right? Yeah, yeah.

He's okay.

Come on, Raymond. You all right?

Come on.

I think I'm gonna

stick with Ping-Pong.

No, you'll

be all right.

- Round one begins.

- Now, check this out.

Look. Look right there.

Look. See?

See how he favors his right?

He does it every time.

You gotta make him use his left.

That'll open him up.

That's what she said.

Aw, come on, Frank. We watched

this, like, 23 times.

I got this.

Alvarez doesn't have a

chance on Saturday.

But remember, you can...

never be too prepared.

I know.

I got something for you.

Oh, Manny, you didn't

have to get me anything.

Just wanna say thank you

for helping me get here.

I never thought I'd have

a chance to turn pro.

Hmm. It's wrapped and

everything, huh?

Shut up.

Just open it.

Oh, man.

Now, what the hell am

I gonna do with this?

Well, I don't know.

How about everything?

It's time you joined

the rest of the world.

Hey. I'm 68 years old.

I've gotten along without

one of these up until now.

Besides, this must've

cost you a bundle.

How did you afford it?

Just saved up for it.

I gotta jump.

You got a date?

Something like that.

Um, I forgot.

I put something

on there for you.

Just turn it on there

and-and tap the screen.

I'll see you tomorrow. All right.

Get some sleep.

Hey, Frank. Pretty nice, huh?

Now you won't have to freak out anymore

when you can't find a pay phone.

So I just wanted...

to say thank you for

being there for me...

and for believing in me

when nobody else would.

I don't know where I'd

be if it wasn't for you.

You've been like a

second dad to me.

And I love you.

I love you too, Mihijo.

Manny! Hey!

Adolfo. Purvis. Drake.

What's up, brothers?

I just got your text.

Got here as quick as I could.

Came from across town.

Oh. Muchas gracias.

I really appreciate that.

So, uh,

maybe you could

help me out here,

but I'm a little confused

about something.

Um, have we not

taken care of you?

Yes, of course. Oh.

So why do you take from me?

What are you talking about?

Come-Please.

Come on. Don't insult Adolfo.

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