Bad Asses

Synopsis: Frank Vega teams up with grumpy old agoraphobic Bernie Pope to kick ass and clean up the streets of L.A.
Genre: Action, Comedy, Drama
Director(s): Craig Moss
Production: Samuel Goldwyn Films
91 min

- Stand up, a**hole.

- I don't want any trouble. Leave me alone.

I can kick your ass while you're

sitting down or standing up. It's your call.

- F*** his sh*t up, Raymond.

- Yeah.

You might

remember him as Bad Ass,

the bearded hero who

stood up for an elderly

gentleman on an S.C.

Transit bus...

and became an overnight

Internet sensation.

Because of his heroic

efforts, Vega was made

an honorary police

officer this morning.

Mmm. Mmm.

Oh, God, you're better than

an alarm clock, Baxter.

Mmm. Good boy. Good boy.

Good boy. Okay,

okay, okay, okay.

Enough kisses.

Ay, yi, yi, yi, yi!


Hey, okay!

Cut the crap out, boy.

No need to get your nuts in my face.


You know what? There's a

pharmacy two doors down.

They started selling hearing aids.

You oughta get yourself some.

Having a sale this

week on Depends.

Your chance to stock up so

you don't crap yourself.

Wow, Bernie. That's the nicest thing

you've said to me in three years.

Yeah. You goddamn welcome. Sh*t.

Stay in the middle.

That's it.

Watch it. There we go.

Right there.

Defense! Defense! That's it.

That's it.

Stay up there. That's it.

That's it.

Let's go. Let's go to the body now.

Come on.

Do some body work.

Do some body work.

Let's go! Body!

Body. That's it. That's it.

That's it.

That's it. Okay.

All right, Manny. Two jabs and a right

hand. Two jabs and a right hand.

Oh! Oh, sh*t.

Damn, Manny.

You tore his head off.


Jesus Christ, Frank. I'm sorry.

Come on.

Come on, Raymond. Hey!

Is he all right? Yeah, yeah.

He's okay.

Come on, Raymond. You all right?

Come on.

I think I'm gonna

stick with Ping-Pong.

No, you'll

be all right.

- Round one begins.

- Now, check this out.

Look. Look right there.

Look. See?

See how he favors his right?

He does it every time.

You gotta make him use his left.

That'll open him up.

That's what she said.

Aw, come on, Frank. We watched

this, like, 23 times.

I got this.

Alvarez doesn't have a

chance on Saturday.

But remember, you can...

never be too prepared.

I know.

I got something for you.

Oh, Manny, you didn't

have to get me anything.

Just wanna say thank you

for helping me get here.

I never thought I'd have

a chance to turn pro.

Hmm. It's wrapped and

everything, huh?

Shut up.

Just open it.

Oh, man.

Now, what the hell am

I gonna do with this?

Well, I don't know.

How about everything?

It's time you joined

the rest of the world.

Hey. I'm 68 years old.

I've gotten along without

one of these up until now.

Besides, this must've

cost you a bundle.

How did you afford it?

Just saved up for it.

I gotta jump.

You got a date?

Something like that.

Um, I forgot.

I put something

on there for you.

Just turn it on there

and-and tap the screen.

I'll see you tomorrow. All right.

Get some sleep.

Hey, Frank. Pretty nice, huh?

Now you won't have to freak out anymore

when you can't find a pay phone.

So I just wanted...

to say thank you for

being there for me...

and for believing in me

when nobody else would.

I don't know where I'd

be if it wasn't for you.

You've been like a

second dad to me.

And I love you.

I love you too, Mihijo.

Manny! Hey!

Adolfo. Purvis. Drake.

What's up, brothers?

I just got your text.

Got here as quick as I could.

Came from across town.

Oh. Muchas gracias.

I really appreciate that.

So, uh,

maybe you could

help me out here,

but I'm a little confused

about something.

Um, have we not

taken care of you?

Yes, of course. Oh.

So why do you take from me?

What are you talking about?


Come on. Don't insult Adolfo.

Look, I'd rather you stick a

needle in my eye than insult me.

So I'm gonna give you one more

chance to answer correctly.

And you'll feel liberated, which is

a wonderful thing to feel, Manny,

before you die.

It's just you and me now.

Oh, goddamn it. Miro la

concha de tu hermana.


My bad.

Let's get the hell out of here.


Don't just leave him there.

Pick him up!

What the hell are you thinking?

Hey, Malark. Come by for a beer?

Frank, I'm sorry.

It's Manny.

They were two peas in a pod.

I'm sorry?

Manny and his dad.

They were inseparable.

Once his dad passed away,

his world shattered.

And then you came along.

You changed his world.

He was a great kid.


Will you play Barbies with me?

Oh, honey.

Not now, okay? Maybe later.

Hey, you know, I've played

a few Barbies in my day.

Can I play?

Okay, I'll be the purple one?


Okay. Come on.

Is this like Mermaid Barbie?

Uh-huh. You want anything?

1, 2,

3, 4,

5, 6,

7, 8-

Don't peek! Don't peek!

Okay. My eyes are closed tight.

9, 10.

Here I come, ready or not.

Where's Julia?

Okay. Where is-I

hear something.

Uh-oh. I hear something.

Where is she?

Where is she?

Ah! There she is. No fair.

I wouldn't have found you

if you had a secret door.

I want a secret door. Please!

Well, we'll have to

talk to your mom.

Talk to your mom about what?

A secret door, Mommy.

It's great for hide-and-go-seek.

- Yeah?

- Yeah, I was the hit of the neighborhood.

Well, that sounds like fun.

Thank you, Mommy!

That's the first time I've seen

her smile since it happened.

That's a wonderful little girl.

You're gonna find the animals

who killed my baby, aren't you?

- The police are doing everything they.

- No, they're not.

Mrs. Parkes-I know who you are,

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Craig Moss

For the British rugby league player of the same name, see Craig Moss (rugby league)Craig Moss is an American film director, writer and actor, who is known for making parody films and action comedy productions. His films include The 41-Year-Old Virgin Who Knocked Up Sarah Marshall and Felt Superbad About It. He also directed the film Bad Ass, and its sequels, Bad Ass 2: Bad Asses and Bad Asses on the Bayou. He is a graduate of UCLA, and also owns production company Spotfellas. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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