Bachelor Mother

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MERLIN:
It is now five minutes before 9..00

on the day before Christmas.

As has been my custom for the past 22 years,

I address you today.

I wish to offer you my thanks

for your loyalty and cooperation

during the past year.

I needn't add that

my son joins me in my sentiments.

So, from the bottom of our hearts,

we wish you the very merriest,

merriest of Christmases

and the happiest of New Years.

All right, everybody, dismissed.

Christmas card.

-You get one?

-Uh-uh.

Don't be jealous.

Gee, it's not gonna be easy

getting a job after Christmas.

It wasn't easy before Christmas.

I wonder if they'd give me a pension.

I worked here for three weeks.

Look, honey,

maybe you ought to go back home, huh?

There's nobody there anymore.

-Haven't you anyone in New York?

-No, I haven't.

Mary, is it hard for a girl to get in the Navy?

FREDDlE:
Quack, quack, quack, quack.

Good morning, girls.

Hey, no kidding,

what are you getting me for Christmas?

You wouldn't drink it.

She's crazy for me.

Hey, Polly, I saw you hoofing

at the employees' ball.

Babe, you're really solid.

-Think so?

-Yeah.

And just to prove it to you,

I'm gonna take you dancing tonight.

No. I don't feel like it.

Not even for 50 bucks?

You mean,

you're going to give me 50 bucks?

Yeah, in a way. Come here.

Now, listen. There's a dancing contest

tonight at the Pink Slipper.

The orchestra leader's one of the judges

and he's my best pal.

So we win second prize,

50 bucks and we split it up the middle.

(BELL BUZZlNG)

Uh-oh, here they come.

Well, what do you say?

You just made a deal.

-Okay, I'll pick you up at 7.:00.

-7.:
00.

After supper.

(QUACKlNG)

WOMAN:
Where are you

going for lunch, Mamie?

(HORN BLARlNG)

Just a minute.

Don't you dare.

Don't you dare leave your baby here.

Oh, I'm not the mother.

There isn't any mother.

They'll take good care of it here.

It's such a wonderful baby.

(BABY CRYlNG)

Won't you come in?

Take your finger out of your mouth.

Take your finger out of your mouth.

You must be hungry.

They'll give you something to eat here.

-How do you do?

-Hello.

Come on, darling,

you mustn't eat your fingers.

Your name, please.

Polly Parrish.

Are you employed anywhere?

I'm at Merlin's.

You're so cute.

Oh, just a minute.

This isn't my baby.

I found it on the doorstep outside.

No, really.

An old lady left it on the doorstep

and I was afraid it might roll off,

-so the best thing for me to do was to...

-My dear young lady,

we're only here to help you.

We're your friends.

I wasn't leaving it.

I was just picking it up.

A great many mothers

say that babies aren't theirs,

but we've discovered from experience

that the wisest cause

is to make a clean breast of the whole thing.

Well, now, look. This is ridiculous.

This is not my baby,

whether you believe it or not.

(BABY CRYlNG)

Heaven's sake.

(BABY CRYlNG)

Just a minute, Miss Parrish.

Listen, when I want a family,

I'll get married and do it right.

-Pathetic.

-Yes, yes.

Well, anyway,

we know that she works at Merlin's

and they're a very charitable family.

-I'll go over right after lunch.

-That's right.

-Good morning, Mr Merlin.

-Good morning.

Good morning, Mr Merlin.

Good afternoon.

Good morning, Mr Merlin.

Good morning, Dad.

Good afternoon.

You're so interested in politics, you should

investigate the police force in Scarsdale.

And why?

Well, any motorcycle cop who can afford

to turn down a hundred-dollar bribe

must be in some crooked racket.

Don't you think so?

-Did you sleep in jail?

-No.

No, I didn't sleep at all.

I had to wait for the court to open.

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