Antiviral Page #5

Yeah.

That's too bad.

He did some really good work for me.

Here, have some Hannah.

On the house.

There is less light

in the world now.

That much is certain.

A ray of light has been lost.

Hannah was a friend of this clinic,

and I'm proud to say

I knew her personally.

She was truly

a sweet and a humble soul.

Our prayers here at Lucas

are with her family and loved ones.

- So what's your professional opinion?

- What?

Well, you must have had

a good look at her.

We've got a pre-autopsy pool

going with the guys in accounting.

Mercer's playing it safe

and going with flu virus.

I'm thinking of taking a flyer

and going with food poisoning.

Do you think

it might have been food poisoning?

I don't know.

Of course, no one's saying drugs.

They'll never admit it if it is drugs.

- She didn't do drugs.

- Oh, you knew her well?

She was a Buddhist from birth.

She couldn't even take painkillers

or she would have been beaten.

I hear we'll be selling ringworm

from her dog Brom to fans with dogs.

Brom's getting a following.

Hey, Dorian turned your sample over

to the board this morning.

That's a bit exciting, our little shop

on the fringes of a media frenzy.

Can I have a 900 pack?

What's a 900 pack?

Hannah Geist variety pack.

Everybody's guzzling Geist today.

Everyone's talking about her...

Oh, my gosh.

I don't even know if I can say it.

Her anus. You heard that right.

Rumours of the young star's situation

have been spreading like a rash,

with news outlets as far as Japan,

Australia and even the Middle East

scrambling to get the poop

on recent documents

leaked by the office

of Aria's specialist.

Swedish media network SM has even offered a bounty

for photographic evidence

of the unusual condition.

Sources close to her say

the normally hard-partying celeb

hasn't been seen in public since.

Well, that settles it.

I'm getting a camera.

- You would do that.

- The hunt is on.

Meanwhile, Hannah Geist's

former dog walker has opened up

in a recent interview

with our sister station.

51-year-old Helen Pinto was employed

full time at the now-shuttered estate

and caused quite a stir earlier today

when she claimed to be holding

one of the star's used panty liners.

Pinto said she retrieved the liner

towards the end of Hannah's illness

and was in the process

of having it analysed...

- What's with the cane?

- I've been having a little trouble.

I've gotta make a quick stop

before we get your part.

It must have happened overnight.

We found them like this in the morning.

I've never seen anything

like this before.

I mean, they were fine

when we shipped them.

Obviously they weren't fine.

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