Alice in Wonderland Page #3

Oh, yes, yes that's good.

Now climb up.

What for?

You've got to get on the roof, slide down

the chimney and see who's in the house.

Why?

Because I can't get through

the door or windows.

Ah now sir, that's a mighty clever idea.

But you see, I've got a

bad back for chimneys.

I inherited it from my mother.

We've always had terrible

backs for chimneys!

Oh you do it, Bill!

Who me?

Yes you!

Oh... alright then.

Quick. Hurry!

Now careful, Bill, there's a loose

slate up there somewhere.

Ah, good man, you've found it!

Pat, tell him to climb down the chimney.

Bill.

Ow.

...climb down the chimney!

He shouldn't do that?!

Not down the chimney... don't try it!

Ya-hoo!

There goes Bill.

Oh. Oh dear.

Bill! Bill! What happened, lad?

Hold up his head... here's brandy

Ah thank you, your worship

Not you!

Ah sorry, purely medicinal, runs in the family.

What happened, Bill?

Well something comes at me,

like a Jack-in-the-box, and then

up I goes like a sky-rocket.

Spoken like a true Irishman, Bill.

I don't like the look of this.

There's nothing for it!

We must burn down the house!

Good thinking, your worship.

Would you like me to sing

some melodies of Old Ireland?

No, just burn down the house!

Oh, no you don't!

You're not burning down

this house while I'm inside!

Ha ha. A barrow full should do!

Ready, aim...

Fire!

Ah, stop it. You'd better not do that again!

Hmm.

They're not real pebbles

They're soft like sponge cakes...

Now I must go and find that lovely garden.

No one will think of looking for me there.

Everything seems different from down here.

I have to keep looking up.

I'm sure little people must

get very bad neck strain.

It's enough to make a cat bark.

I used to read fairy tales,

I never thought I would end

up in the middle of one.

There ought to be a book written about me.

Maybe when I grow up I'll write one.

Sir.

Sir, who do I have the honour of addressing?

Major Caterpillar, ribbon and bar...

Late of "Her Majesty's Foot and Light"...

A true son of England and it's flag what...

Who're you?

I don't really know.

If you don't, I don't!

I know who I was this morning

but I think I've been changed

several times since then.

Explain yourself or you'll

find yourself on a charge.

Well, I can't explain myself, sir,

because I'm not myself, you see.

No, I don't see.

Everyone should be the

right size, shouldn't they.

But I've been so many different

sizes in one day it's very confusing.

Why?

Well, if you were to change...

into a butterfly say you'd find

it quite strange, wouldn't you?

Not a bit of it! Nothing's strange to me!

I don't think you should talk to me like that.

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