A Life Less Ordinary
- R
- Year:
- 1997
- 103 min
- 664 Views
MAN:
So, here's the deal.We are in the garden, right?
And everything is great.
And there's this tree.
And the man says,
"Ooh, see that tree?
"Don't eat the fruit
of that tree.
"That apple you do not eat."
He goes inside,
names some animals...
maybe takes a dump.
Anyway, what does she do?
She eats the apple!
I can't believe what I'm seeing!
He says, "Don't eat it!"
She eats it!
- Unbelievable!
- [Siren]
Since then, men, women...
I don't know.
It's all going wrong!
DIANA ROSS SINGING:
So inviting
So exciting
Whenever you're near
I hear a symphony
A tender melody
Pulling me closer
Closer to your arms
Then suddenly
Your lips are touching mine
A feeling so divine
Till I leave the past behind
I'm lost in a world
Of make-believe
Whenever you're near
I hear a symphony...
GABRIEL:
Divorce.Miserable marriage.
Wedding canceled.
Remarried.
Divorced again.
Ahh!
Irreconcilable
sexual disharmony!
Dysfunctional marriage!
Divorce! Divorce!
Divorce! Divorce!
Divorce! Divorce!
Well?
Talk to me.
We had a bad run.
O'REILLY:
Things have changed down there.
Men and women
aren't like they used to be.
GABRIEL:
Well, things arechanging up here as well.
I'm getting pressure
from above...
if you know what I mean,
for results!
For men and women to be bonded
in eternal bliss.
In the meantime, I've been
instructed to introduce...
new incentive schemes
for our leading operatives.
Leading operatives, huh?
That's you.
O'REILLY:
Skip the flattery,Gabriel. Where's the beef?
It's a hard case to crack.
I have full confidence
you can do it.
If you don't...
you don't come back.
What?
No way.
That's the new incentive scheme.
Your mission
is to unite man and woman...
blah, blah, blah, blah, OK?
When you're done...
you come back.
If youfail...
you stay down there forever.
You are not serious.
GABRIEL:
Liberatum mani.It's out of my hands.
[Distant siren]
SNEAKER PIMPS SINGING:
No ordinary sin
I'd rather sink than swim
If I can't walk on water
Let the scandal in
I can't walk on water
This taste of dilution
Velvet divorce
I get bored
Velvet divorce
I get bored
Velvet divorce
Velvet divorce
I get bored
ROBERT:
She's the secret daughter...
of Marilyn Monroe
and John F. Kennedy, right?
I mean, that's why Marilyn
was murdered.
So, the young girl
grows up in an orphanage...
unaware of
her incredible parentage.
Years go by.
She's beautiful.
She's smart.
She's successful, OK?
MAN ON RIGHT:
Then what?ROBERT:
Well, then...Then she gets sent to London
as U.S. ambassador.
MAN ON LEFT:
Where she discoverswho she is...
and also unravels
the secret of the Nazi gold...
hidden underneath the embassy.
ROBERT:
Uh, yeah.MAN ON RIGHT:
It's kind of obvious, Robert.
Of course it's obvious, guys.
It's a trash novel.
You buy it in the airport,
you take it on holiday.
Oh, Ms. Gesteten.
Nice to see you down here.
I'd love to stay and talk,
but, um, you know how things...
ELLIOT:
Nice trick, Celine.- Want to try your luck?
- With the gun?
CELINE:
With the fruit.ELLIOT:
I don't have time for games.
CELINE:
If you're afraid,why don't you just say so?
ELLIOT:
Celine, last night,we discussed a certain proposal.
And I said no,
because you cheat, Elliot.
ELLIOT:
OK.So I'm flirtatious.
It's in my nature.
But I want you to think again.
Do you know how difficult
it is for a woman to find...
a good husband in this town?
Let alone a good dentist.
Celine...
I'm serious.
Robots?
You're telling us we're gonna be
replaced by robots?
That robots will get down on
their robot hands and knees...
and clean the dust out of
every office in this building?
I think not, Ms. Gesteten.
At least the robot won't spend
its time writing a trash novel.
Not even a very good
trash novel, as I understand it.
[Man on right whistling]
Oh, I see. This is personal.
This has nothing to do with me,
Robert.
This comes right from the top...
from Mr. Naville himself.
Perhaps it's time
I spoke to this Mr. Naville guy.
GESTETEN:
It's too late.You're fired.
CELINE:
You ready?ELLIOT:
Mm-hmm.CELINE:
Now, if you move...the offer's canceled.
ELLIOT:
OK.Mm-hmm.
- Wait, Celine...
- Don't speak.
Do you think this is wise?
Puts me off.
ELLIOT:
Ha.Ha.
Stop!
[Body falls]
ELLIOT:
Aah! Aah! Aah!CELINE:
Mayhew...[Robert screaming]
Would you call a doctor?
It would be a pleasure, madam.
LILY:
What are you doing herethis time of day?
Hi, Lily.
Well? Answer me.
Lily, I... I got fired.
They replaced me with a robot.
I know how they feel.
ROBERT:
Hmm?Look, I've been meaning
to tell you this...
for a while now, and...
seems like a good a time as any.
Robert...
I'm leaving you.
You're leaving?
What are you talking about?
LILY:
His name is Ryan.He teaches aerobics.
We're in love.
We're moving to Miami.
ROBERT:
How can you do this?At a time like this!
LILY:
I want a man, not a dreamer.
I don't know what to say.
I'll get another job.
We'll sort everything out.
LILY:
Sorry...but as of tonight...
you're going home alone.
Uh...
Lily!
LILY:
I'm leaving you.GESTETEN:
You're fired.MAN:
It's kind of obvious, Robert.
LILY:
He teaches aerobics.We're in love.
We're moving to Miami.
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"A Life Less Ordinary" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 24 Apr. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/a_life_less_ordinary_1947>.
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