
A Haunted House 2
1
Help me get her in the car, Ray!
Okay, but this bitch
heavy as hell, Cuz!
Nigga, get yo' hands off her ass!
Let me finger gangbang
her at least, homie!
- Just help me get it off of her!
- Okay, one finger then!
A'right, but we ain't
goin' inside, homie.
We gonna go around
the emergency loop...
roll her ass out like
we do all the homies...
that get shot in the hood, homie.
Why you snuff her
fine ass anyway, homie?
I wanted to bone, Cuz.
- She was possessed, Ray!
- Possessed?
Possessed like head spinnin'
around vomitin' everywhere?
Or like possessed like Kanye
when you take a picture of him?
Just drive like you
got warrants, please!
Nigga, I do got warrants! Look!
These right here! Jaywalkin'!
For eating grapes in the grocery
store without payin' for 'em!
Shavin' my dog's balls in public.
Drivin' with my hands
off the wheel, Cuz.
I be ghost-drivin' my whip, Cuz.
I like doin' that shit, homie.
An altercation with my Moms,
homie, but she provoked me, Cuz!
- Ray-Ray, I think she's waking.
- All right, here! Take this...
and pistol-whip her
with the butt of the gun.
I'm not pistol-whippin'
my girlfriend!
A'right, nigga, well, you drive
and I'll pistol-whip that bitch!
- Kisha, resist!
- But you didn't!
I've seen you for the
bitch that you are, Malcolm.
- What's she talkin' 'bout, homie?
- Booty pirates!
- Nuttin', she's possessed, man.
- S'right, you fucker!
He's a ghost buster!
That sound real suspect
back there, homie.
Was you in juvie, Cuz?
If you don't cry you ain't
no bitch in there, homie.
I didn't cry. Doodles on
they. Joke's on them, Cuz.
that somebody gave me...
while I was locked up...
- Who are you?
- It's Father Williams, homie.
She do a mean impression
of that nigga, Cuz.
I do a mean impression
of The Butler. Check it:
"I'm here for the boss.
I'm here to serve the boss."
- Who are you?
- I'm Forest Whitaker, homie.
From the movie that's
like "The Help" but...
He didn't doo-doo
in the pie, homie.
Ray, I'm not talkin' to you!
I'm talkin' to Kisha. Ray!
Are you gonna let that
bitch choke you out, Cuz?
You a bitch, homie...
- Get the f*ck off me!
- Kisha! Kisha!
Shit, she breathed
in my face, homie.
I'll get the bird
u, it's contagious...
She blacked out, Ray.
Hurry, we don't have much
time! Get us to the hospital.
Hurry!
Ray? Ray?
Oh, shit!
Oh, my God!
Kisha?
Kisha!
Ray? Ray!
It's a good thing I drank
that Hennessy earlier.
I can't feel shit, homie!
- I think Kisha's dead.
- Good!
Let's get the tuck
outta here, homie!
Listen. We were never here.
- I'm with you, Cuz.
- All right. Deuces!
We ghost hunters!
I don't know about
this place, baby.
You've said that about
There's just something creepy
about this place, like...
give me the heebie-jeebies...
like somethin' bad
happened in here.
Well, I love it. And I love you.
There you go, bribin'
me with vagina.
- Whatever works.
- Know when I'm weak.
Disgusting.
Oh, it's disgusting
when we do it...
but when you kissing
the whole entire...
sophomore class it's cool, huh?
Gimme that damn
camera, you little gnat!
- Finger. Real creative.
- Cut her some slack.
She's just goin' through a phase.
Yeah, a phase. It's called "whore."
- Look at that. Last a lifetime.
- Malcolm, stop!
No, see, that's a phase.
Looks like he met an
imaginary friend. It's normal.
What you doin' there, buddy?
Wanna help me load some boxes?
- Cool!
- A'right. My man!
- Sorry, Malcolm. I can't.
- Why not?
Tony says, "Aw, hell
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"A Haunted House 2" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 28 Jan. 2021. <https://www.scripts.com/script/a_haunted_house_2_1926>.