2 Days in the Valley

Synopsis: John Herzfeld deftly welds together a multitude of subplots-- a loser hitman and a cool assassin involved in an insurance scam; a washed-up director, turned suicidal, if only he had someone to care for his beloved dog; a snooty art dealer, wracked by kidney stones, cared for by his devoted assistant; a grungy deranged vice cop, now partnered with a fresh-faced rookie; and two beautiful and jealous women entangled in their deadly scheme--into a spoof of the crime thriller genre.
Director(s): John Herzfeld
Production: HBO Video
  1 nomination.
Rotten Tomatoes:
104 min


You know that first amount

of money you offered me...

you understand why

I had to turn you down?

I made good money

when I worked.

Yeah, I know,

where I live...

it doesn't look

I'm that well off because...

well, that's because

I was gambling.

I was f***ing sick and blew every dime

I made because I had a gambling habit.

But now I'm trying to do

the right thing.

Even though we never

worked together...

I value this

in a relationship.

But I won't work for nothing.

Sure, I can use the money...

but I gotta be paid my quota.

You understand that, don't you?

How long since

you've worked, Dosmo?

Hey, you go through a little

dry spell, what's it make?

It makes you stronger.

I'm okay. I always knew

I'd be back.

What is it?

Sounds like she's having

a bad dream.


I'm on my knees,

where you always wanted me to be.

I never wanted you

on your knees, Roy.

What do I do next,

beg or bark?

All right. Come on the bed.

Go to sleep on this side.

- My little worm.

- Don't call me that.

But you were

my little worm, right?


Why did you come over?

Because it's our anniversary.

I kept thinking of all the good times.

So, you seeing someone?

No. No one special.

How many girls are you seeing?

No one.

- Are you gonna try for '98?

- No.

- What's so funny?

- He is.

What's going on?

He's trying to screw her.

He's in her bed?

When I saw you before I skated,

that's why I fell.

Tell me what the f***'s happening.


Come on, Becky. I miss you.

That's why I came over here.

Why are you doing this?

What are you doing here? You left me!

I think I made a mistake.

Who's the Norwegian bimbo you brought

to watch me race in Lillehammer?

Helga? Did she distract you?

No. No, not at all.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw

this giant, Viking blonde...

with blue eyes

crawling all over you.

Didn't distract me at all. Blocked it

out and came in fourth f***ing again!

At least you came in fourth.

Let's just go to sleep.

This is a destructive relationship.

I'm not starting it again!

Why am I getting turned on then?

- I know you want it.

- Go call your Viking...

Come on.

Becky, I think I'm still

in love with you. I do.

Roy, stop it. I mean it.

Stop it.

I'll throw you out.

Good night.

Oh, God.

They're going back to sleep.

Let's go.

What the f*** happened?

Does every other word have to be "f***"?

Is that the extent of your vocabulary?

It f***ing bothers you?

I didn't f***ing know.

Very quietly.

This ain't my first barbecue.

You sure she don't have

a f***ing dog?

Tough guy like you

is afraid of dogs?

I ain't afraid of them.

They just don't like me.

I don't know what it is.

They always growl at me.


You don't have the rent?

What would you do

if you were me...

and I hadn't paid the rent

for four months?

I would evict me.

I don't wanna be

an a**hole, Teddy.

You're not an a**hole, Evelyn.

I'll be gone tomorrow.

Where will you go?

Listen, there's one thing

you could do.

I may be moving around

for a while, and...

would you look after Bogey?

You're not giving him away?

What about that agent you ate with once

a week? Couldn't he advance you money?

He doesn't return my calls.

Okay, little man,

one last walk to the park.


When I do it,

I'll load it first.

Is she out?


Okay, buddy, lay back.

I'm gonna take the gun out of your

mouth, and you're gonna be quiet, right?

Otherwise I'm going to

have to pull the trigger.

Open up.

So I don't hurt the teeth.

You mind if I smoke?

You have one minute to decide

the rest of your life.

I'm gonna ask you

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John Herzfeld

John Herzfeld is an American film and television director, screenwriter, actor and producer. His feature film directing credits include Two of a Kind, 2 Days in the Valley, 15 Minutes and The Death and Life of Bobby Z. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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