Yellowbeard Page #11

- Captain.

Get out, you coward.

- Ebenezer.

- Yes, Percy?

- I've been thinking.

- Oh, yes?

Can brandy make you see things?

- If you drink enough of it.

- Oh, that explains it.

- That island I thought I saw.

- Island?

- It is an island.

- Of course.

It's beautiful.

- Prepare the longboat, Mr. Tarbuck.

- Aye, aye, sir.

Now, men, a group of us are going

to put ashore here for provisions.

Provisions. Oh, yes. Of course, sir.

Could be a mirage.

Looks rather like a mirage I once saw.

If I saw it.

Is it anything like the map on my head?

This is the island.

I gladly moisten your foot with my nostrils,

Your Barbarity.

I have something very nice to show you.

Excellent.

So, explain to me, Seor Verdugo...

the intricacies of this

most holy instrument of confession.

Triola, I don't think you should see this,

my daughter.

- It's only another torture machine.

- I want it to be a surprise for you.

- Later, my sweet.

- All right, Daddy.

- So, my new confessional.

- Yes, of course.

But first, Your Severity,

you will notice that the instrument...

is completely surrounded

by this pool of acid...

which will destroy anything thrown into it...

except gold and precious stones.

But flesh and bone and iron...

Observe.

Voil!

And it doesn't dissolve gold, you say?

No. Not, of course.

Of course not, Your Vapidity.

Even if they have swallowed their valuables,

Your Severity...

there would be no need for

those messy searches that we used to have.

Unless we want one.

Of course, Your Outrageousness.

So this is my new confessional?

Yes, it is. It works this way, Your Ferocity.

If you will, please.

The prisoner...

is totally restrained...

by means of this iron banding.

Excellent. Excellent.

But there is more to it than that,

Your Blizzard of the Wrong.

By means of these ratchets

and these screws...

you can place his body

in any position that you want...

for as long as you want

and do anything to it that you want.

You can break every bone in his hand...

one at a time.

- And feet?

- And the feet.

I love it.

- And the back?

- And the back.

- And slowly crush them and break them?

- Oh, yes.

It is very effective,

Your Acute Horrendousness.

People will be even more frightened of me

when they hear I have this.

Oh, yes, definitely, Your Blind Stupidity.

Even you, Seor Verdugo?

Well, of course not me.

I mean, after all, I made it. I designed it.

It's my baby.

Well, let's see if it works.

If it does not work,

I shall dispatch you with heavenly force.

Well, we could all do

with some good food and clean water.

- Mr. Moon, prepare a hunting party.

- Aye, aye, sir.

Why don't you go ahead and forage...

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