The Toxic Avenger: The Musical Page #3

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find in the (mumbles)...

So what did you find in the town files?

- Information so

disturbing, it could topple

the powers that run our tiny metropolis.

- What, do you mean the mayor?

Oh Melvin are you saying

you're gonna fight the mayor?

- Me?

Oh don't be ridiculous!

- Now don't tell me you're scared!

- Oh, in fact I'm

intimidated by any person

in any position of authority!

- So you're just going to

let the Good Earth turn

Tromaville into a, a cesspool

of pollution and disease?

- I hate any form of conflict!

(smacking)

Oh!

- Well then, someone has

a dilemma, don't they?

One, two, three, four, five, six--

- Sarah did you really think I--

Do you really think I could--

- Melvin,

may I touch your body's

most exciting organ?

- What...

(tender music)

- Hmm, I was right.

You do have a beautiful soul.

(mumbles), oh seven, seven, eight...

I will save you Sarah

I'll clean the air for you

And if I save you Sarah

Perhaps you'll love me too

(sympathetic music)

(audience applauding)

I'm the mayor of this crappy town

So let me tell you

how it's gonna go down

Now I'm gonna star your toxic trash

And you will pay me boatloads of cash

Cash, cash

I'm just a Jersey girl

I'm gonna rule the world

I was born to run this state

She was born, she was born to run

She's got a lot of love in her

So I'm gonna be the governor

The on the take candidate

On the take, she's on the take

She's gonna be the next governor

To run this state you

must shake it down

Tell us more

You lie or cheat or you sleep around

She's a whore

I do things the Jersey way

And there's only one thing to say

I'm just a Jersey gal

A feisty femme fatale

I'll be living on a prayer

She'll be living, living on a prayer

So watch me as I campaign

Through snow and sleet and acid rain

Can you feel the love

in the Jersey air

Feel the love, feel

the love in the air

She's just a Jersey dame

(mumbling)

Everybody's

High school flame

- Haven't I seen you somewhere

around my campaign

She was born to run

- trail?

this state

I was born, I was born to run

She's got a lot of love in her

There's an angel from above in her

Cause someday, I'm

gonna be the governor

You know what to do boys

You!

Ooh

I'm gonna be

She's gonna be

A gorgeous, governor

Oh oh

Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh

oh oh oh oh oh oh oh

Governor

(audience applauding)

- Excuse me.

(audience snickering)

- Okay boys.

See you next week.

Who are you and how the

hell did you get in here?

- Your secretary wasn't there.

- Dammit, never hire your mother.

- Madam Mayor, I am Melvin Ferd III,

an aspiring Earth Scientist

and you must listen to me!

- Oh!

- I know who owns the evil

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