Night of Something Strange Page #2

- Road beers.

- Oh sh*t.

(engine turns over)

(whoops)

(scratchy orchestral music)

(water gurgling)

(loud sniffing)

(gurgling chomps)

(staccato violin)

- [Male GPS] Continue on

this route for 87 miles.

- Yo, can that GPS tell

us where we could get

some dank nugs?

- (scoffs) I wish.

- So, what's the first

thing you guys are gonna do

when you get to the beach?

- I'm gonna get f***in' drunk.

- I can't wait to just lay out.

- Me too and take

a dip in the ocean.

- Yeah, I can't wait to

part that mother-f***er.

- Yeah, swim, for sure.

- You gonna swim with your

shirt on again, Jason?

- What, I get sunburned easy.

- Yeah, it's not

'cause of your mits?

- Mits?

- Yeah, man tits.

(giggling)

- Shut up, Freddy.

I told you I was born

with an extra thyroid.

- And two stomachs like a cow.

- Cows have four

stomachs, dumb ass.

- Don't be jealous 'cause

Jason has bigger tits than you.

- F*** you, Freddy.

- Don't be a dick.

- What?

- Cool, weed.

What, I can get down.

- Hey, so, why did

Samara bail again?

- Oh, she had crabs, she didn't

wanna give it to everybody.

(laughing)

- Smart ass.

- [Christine] Yeah, right.

- Yeah, I need to take you

small-town peeps to BK,

show you how we get

down for real, for real.

- Yeah, I could

go for a Whopper.

- No, man, I'm talkin'

about Brooklyn, fool.

- I thought you said

you were from Syracuse.

- Well, yeah, I mean I am but

I hung out in Brooklyn a lot.

That's where my cousins stay at.

- Aren't they like,

really far apart?

Like hundreds of miles?

- Yeah, I live like

right on the line.

What are you, The

Riddler or somethin'?

Stop askin' me so

many questions.

I'm tryin' to roll this blunt.

You know, this sh*t

right here is the truth.

- What the f***?

- Oh, sh*t, what.

Yo, this dude got a hard-on, yo.

- No, I don't.

- F***in' perv.

- Gross!

- What, I don't even know what

you guys are talking about.

- I have to go to the bathroom.

(slow suspenseful

orchestral melody)

(glass crunches)

(splats)

(dog barking)

(low growl)

(thumping rock melody)

(growling)

(doors slamming)

- [Brooklyn] Hey, Jason,

bring me back a sweet tea.

- Hi, where is your bathroom?

- Who wants to know?

- Uh, me?

I really need to use

your bathroom, miss.

- It's around back, darlin'.

- [{Carrie] Thank you.

- Honey, ain't you

forgettin' somethin'?

You need a key.

- Oh.

Thanks.

(discordant orchestral music)

(Carrie gasps)

- Don't you be goin' and

flushin' your bloody tampons

down that toilet and

leavin' 'em all which-away,

you throw 'em in the

goddamn trash, you hear?

- Um, okay.

- All you high school girls

bleed like Dracula f***ed

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