My Fake Fiance Page #2

way more clever. You know, you're smarter than you look.

You guys are really a cliche, you know that?

- We are not.

- Are too.

- We are not.

Let's get out of here

-Congratulations.

-Excuse Me?

Oh well, I couldn't help but notice.You know,

there's an easier way to do that.

Everything is computerised these days,

so just choose what you want,

aim the gun at the barcode and pull the trigger.

It's a lot of fun.

Wow. This is fun.

Here you go. You know what they say?

It pays to get married.

-'Hey, it's Courtney. Leave me a message'.

-Hey, Courtney. It's Jennifer.I hope you guys are

having a great time on your honeymoon.

But, listen, um, there was a guy at the wedding.

I think his name was Vince.

Well, we were talking and I just have some information for him,

so no big deal, but, you know, if you could call me

back with his number, that'd be great. Thanks.

Ooh, the monkey guy.

-Hi, is, uh... ? Is Monkey there?

-It's 'the' Monkey.

-What?

-You heard me.

'The' Monkey? You're the kidding, right?

No, I'm not kidding.

-Oh, Sorry.

-Who is this?

Listen, a guy named Vince called you the other day from my phone,

and I really need to talk to him, but I don't have his number

- I'll give it to you.

- Oh, that's great. Thanks.

-You're very 'the' kind.

-What are you, smart?

-Okay, I won't do it again. I'm sorry.

-I have to admit, I was a little surprised you called.

I didn't think you liked me.

- I don't.

- Well, I don't like you either.

- Great. Lunch?

Did you put it on a credit card? Maybe the

credit-card company insurance will pay for it.

I checked. The truck is covered, but not what was in it.

That's too bad. You know, I still don't see what

all this has to do with me, though.

I was thinking about something you said at the wedding about how

the money we put into wedding gifts is like a savings account.

Well, I really need to make a withdrawal. Really, really can't sleep

another night on throw pillows. So what I was thinking was...

- I'm in.

- Well, I didn't even...

I'm in. I love it. It's perfect. I'm in. We stage a fake wedding.

We invite everyone that we know. You register for the stuff

you want to replace, I get to keep all the cash.

It's perfect. I'm in. How long do we have to stay

married in order to keep the gifts?

So you think it's a good idea?

Ooh, you know what else? You could turn all the gifts into cash

too. Take the whole bundle down to the track,

double and triple our money, furnish your place like a palace.

Check, please. Yeah, this won't work. Wedding's off.

Wow, talk about commitment issues. You're getting

cold feet over our pretend wedding.

Hello? You're kidding? Where? That's great.

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