My Beautiful Broken Brain Page #2

Okay.

I want you to say some words

beginning with... [emphasizing "S"]

-[emphasizing "S"]

-Yeah. [emphasizing "S"]

You think you can do that?

Um...

So, it could be, um, "sound,"

or "swing," or "sitting."

So, it's starting from... now.

[emphasizing "S"] Summer.

-Mmm.

-Or did I already...?

S... Okay.

[emphasizing "S"] Seed.

[emphasizing "S"]

[chuckles, stammers] I get--

I get too...

[sobbing]

[Jan] She wasn't able to do the tests

that they do for these situations.

[therapist]

I know you're trying your best...

[Jan] So it was becoming clear

that there was... more severe issues.

But, I mean, not knowing...

not understanding, really,

what those issues were.

[Sophie] So why don't you just tell me...

what's happened?

I was in a pretty normal,

very busy, normal...

[stammering] Kind of a clever person.

And now, I'm starting from the beginning.

[Sophie] What does it feel like?

It's extremely strange,

starting from nothing.

It's like tripping out.

[voice echoes]

I don't really know how to describe it.

How do I say it? I can't...

[stammering]

This normal world...

[stammers] Normality.

I'm very, sort of...

[echoing]

Bizarre is a way to describe it...

It's difficult to... [clicks tongue]

Uh, I guess I'm not making much sense.

Sorry.

I wish I could...

Yeah.

I'll try.

[Sophie] What about these photographs?

Do you--

-[Lotje] Pictures?

-[Sophie] Yeah.

Matilda is, um, my...

Is...

[sighs]

My...

She's...

[sighs] I can't...

My... nephew.

-Yeah, my nephew.

-[Sophie] She's your nephew?

Yes, nephew.

And now, she's also a...

A nephew? Neef... Niece.

I meant, "niece."

For some reason,

I can't say the actual word itself.

This word.

-[Sophie] On that shelf?

-Yeah.

-[Sophie] A record.

-Record, yeah.

Exactly, so...

for some reason, I can say...

You say it again.

-[Sophie] Record.

-Record.

Record.

I can only say it if I don't actually...

If I go like that...

-then I can say the word "record."

-[voice echoes] Record.

But not...

[voices echoing]

You say it again.

-[Sophie] Record.

-Record, yeah.

Record.

I can't...

-[pen writing]

-I can't say it now. But I can't...

Um...

You know, I can't speak or...

No, not speak.

I can't...

be clever. [chuckles]

-[pen writing]

-What do you call it? Um...

-[Sophie] Write?

-Yeah, write.

I can't write at all.

Or be clever or be normal.

Any of that.

It's... it's beyond terrifying.

This could read "tale."

Not "tale."

-[Lotje] What does that say? It's "the"?

-[Sophie] Yeah.

[Lotje] Oh, yeah, "the."

-[Lotje] Does that say "the"?

-[Sophie] Yeah.

I've written "the" before.

[voice echoing]

I didn't think I would have trouble

with the word "the."

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