Inserts Page #4

Deportment. It's all in your deportment.

Very good rule of thumb. Why don't

you write it down? Very good rule of...

- Leave the ascot on. I got an idea.

- That reminds me...

I had an idea this morning.

Take a couple aspirin, it'll be gone by lunch.

Now hold on, this is a hot one!

I pull my shorts up, see,

way up around my stomach.

Then I suck it in, see?

Get them on there real tight.

And then, when I'm ready...

pow, I slam it up there

like a brick shithouse!

It tears them, see?

Tears my shorts right up the middle.

And then you grab a shot of her going

bananas for it, see? You get the picture?

Of course, you got to pay for the shorts.

Very interesting idea, Rex.

Where did you get an idea like that?

San Berdoo, on my way over this morning.

Think it'll work?

Why don't you give it a try?

This afternoon at the Beverly Hills Hotel.

- Now take your pants off.

- Oh, smart guy?

How come if you're so smart,

you never leave this house?

That's called your basic rhetorical question.

- Now off with the shorts.

- Anything you say.

You're the Boy Wonder, but I'm gonna tell

Big Mac about this.

He knows a hot one when he sees it.

Big Mac will go bananas for it.

Really? Speaking of stunted bananas,

you want to slap some life into that thing?

Time is money.

Sun's going behind the clouds.

We lose the kid in half an hour.

Come on, let's go.

Wardrobe.

But of course, my dear. Help him

get rigid there, Harlene, will you?

Okay, come here, honey. Come to Momma.

Keep your meat hooks to yourself.

I can handle this on my own.

Look at that thing grow,

like money in the bank.

God, you're a pig, you know that?

- Yeah, you're a dog. Rex, the Wonder Dog!

- Okay, kiddies, okay.

All right, here's the scene.

Harlene, you are on the bed.

Rex, you enter with the ascot.

You sit down, I want you to...

touch it, fondle it, you know,

give me a little of that Dapper Dan stuff.

Right? Okay.

Now, Harlene, you look at him askance-

- Look at his what?

- Look at him...

You look at him askance. You look at him...

Do you remember that...

horse opera you did for DeMille...

when you looked at Bushman,

when he showed you his gun?

Yeah, I remember that. That was in '26.

When I gave them this?

Right. Plenty of that stuff. Okay, good.

- Then you look down at his private parts-

- Private?

- Don't make me laugh.

- Harlene, come on, will you? Come on.

Now. Then you look up at his face

and you laugh.

You laugh in his face. Very simple.

Okay? Ready?

All righty. Let's go for it.

Hey, wait a minute.

Can't we have a run-through?

Rex, what does it take to just sit there

and look stupid?

- I'm warning you, zit-tits.

- Hey, Rex, let's go.

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