Immigration Tango Page #2

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The guy

should be arrested.

Are you sure you don't

want to call the cops?

I'm a Russian immigrant with

three weeks left on my visa.

What are they gonna do?

Maybe I should kick

the crap out of him.

[Laughs]

Yeah, I like that.

I've been to 14 interviews

since I graduated.

No one wants to sponsor

foreigners anymore.

Who cares if your visa's

not good? Just stay.

Millions of people

do it every year.

No.

I won't stay

if I'm not wanted.

[Winces]

[Dials]

Yeah, give me

Immigration.

[Whistling]

Howard!

[Resumes whistling]

Get here

a little faster, buddy.

Come on. Grab that one, too.

[Claps hands]

I've never been so

humiliated in my life,

not even in Moscow,

where you expect men

to act like pigs.

Well, Elena,

you have legal options.

You don't have to let him

get away with this.

He's only a symptom.

I just don't

have status.

That's the problem.

You're smart and ambitious.

You will find a sponsor.

In three weeks?

I know people who've been

looking for anything

that pays for months.

Way to be supportive,

darlin'.

I'm just

being honest with her.

Ha ha! I made this

specially for you.

Seared monkfish in a wild

mushroom broth. Enjoy it.

Smells so good.

Mmm. This is

better than sex.

Well, maybe you

shouldn't have any.

[Giggles]

Mmm.

Enjoy.

This is great, man,

five star.

Thanks, man.

You are

a true artist, Carlos.

It is what I was born

to do, to give pleasure.

Enjoy it, okay?

Thank you.

I'll see you guys

at closing.

You didn't tell him,

did you?

No, only that

I didn't get the job.

You know Carlos.

He'll do

something stupid

and get himself

deported.

I never realized

how careful

immigrants have to be

all the time.

All I ever wanted was

to come to America

and have a better life.

We'll figure this out.

You are our best friends,

and you're

not going anywhere.

Oh, my God.

Congratulations!

[Claps hands]

Yeah. Ha ha ha ha!

MIKE:
What's going on?

They just got engaged.

Oh, how sweet. Hi.

Don't forget my tip.

I mean it.

I know how cheap you are.

ELENA:

I'm worried about them.

CARLOS:
They haven't been

getting along for a while.

Yeah, but it's

getting worse now.

I'm lucky I found you.

If I go back to Russia,

would you come with me?

Freeze! Nobody move!

Wh-What?

On the ground!

Let's go! Get on the ground!

Elena Dubrovnik.

Yes.

You're under arrest, sweetheart.

You're coming with me.

We haven't done anything!

Let her go!

We received information

that your immigration

status has expired.

That's a lie. Who gave

you this information?

That's privileged.

Hey, get your hands

off her, man!

Did he also tell you

he tried to molest me?

Molest you?

Who tried to molest you?

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