Grown Ups 2 Page #2

I love you all!

Bye, Mom.

Bye, Mom, bye.

Yeah, last day of school, Greg.

Last chance to ask

out Nancy Arbuckle.

Nancy Arbuckle... What's that?

You like a girl?

Is that why you've been taking

them long showers?

No, I'm conditioning my hair.

That's all I do in the shower...

Condition my hair.

That's not what

the deer told me.

That deer's a liar.

I heard too much conditioning

can make you go blind.

What? Where'd you hear that?

Higgins.

I should kill him.

He's too chicken

to ask her out, Dad,

'cause she's

the hottest girl in school,

and Greg is fugly.

So what he's fugly? All the

guys in our family are fugly.

That don't stop us from

getting the hot chicks.

Look at me and look at your mother.

I mean, it makes no sense.

Only in, like, a Hollywood

movie or something.

Every guy in

school likes her, Dad.

And you'll be the guy

who ends up with her.

You know why? You're gonna

follow my three-step program.

Number one,

make the girl smile.

Number two, tell her

she has a nice smile.

Number three, say she has to

go out with you that night.

Why that night?

'Cause it gives her less time to

think about how fugly you are.

'Cause you are fugly.

That's the stupidest

thing I ever heard.

And Keithie's right... I'm too

chicken to even talk to her.

Hey, you're a Feder. Feders

ain't afraid of women, buddy.

That's not

the way I'm raising you.

Oh, by the way, Dad, did you ask

Mom if I can play football?

No, I was scared.

I'm afraid she's

gonna yell at me

in that accent that

no one understands.

Come on, Becky, it's 8:00.

School starts at 8:15.

That means we

only have 25 minutes.

Daddy, you promise Mr. Gigglesworth

will be better by bedtime?

Will you stop worrying about him?

He'll be fine. I love you.

Have the best last day, okay?

Okay.

Bye, guys.

Bye, Daddy.

Love you.

And you read

the street signs, okay?

Don't let Bean.

My God,

riding their bikes to school.

Couldn't do that in L.A.

with the nuts out there.

Yeah, 'cause thank God there's

no crazy people out here.

How you doing, Nick?

My wife's leaving

me after three weeks.

Three weeks?

That's not bad for you.

What happened?

She found me eating

a banana with my butt.

Ah. And she didn't like that?

Yeah,

she got really bummed out,

but, you know, I shouldn't have

done it at her mom's house.

Yeah, you...

You seem like you're a little

extra out of it today.

What's going on?

Yeah, I'm a little medicated.

I met a very reliable doctor

at a Cypress Hill concert,

and he floated me a couple pills

just to feel better, you know.

But I don't feel better!

You feel worse!

Ladies and gentlemen,

meet your new bus driver.

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