Free Samples Page #2

have to wander the streets

on a Thursday morning asking a

bunch of senseless questions

to the first person you meet

who's trapped in a truck.

Look, I'm just curious.

Chocolate or vanilla?

Which one do you like?

How do you work here and

not try both your flavors?

You're doing it again.

What do people usually get?

Strawberry.

That wasn't even an option.

Your two flavors are only

chocolate or vanilla.

Oh, that's a joke.

Ok, I think I'll take

the choc-str-ch-chocolate.

Did it take a long time

to learn ow-

Oh, thank you.

Hey.

Uh, Chocolate or vanilla?

Chocolate.

You know, you're like

the first person around here

who hasn't remarked on us

being identical twins.

Well, I was going to but to be

honest,

I'm hung-over and

I just wasn't entirely sure

if I was seeing

two people or not.

You're twins.

Thanks for the ice cream.

# 'Cause I'm broke,

and that aint no joke. #

# A quarter's what I need

but I'll take a dime. #

# Excuse me people!

No!

Yes!

No! Yeahyeah.

I'm talking to you.

Me?

What? Uh, you and that bongo

have got to go.

My head cannot take it.

$5 I will give this to you

if you go away. Where?

You don't have to leave

the state or anything.

Just go somewhere I can't

hear you, ok? Okay.

Cool.

Um, hey, hey!

Uh, wait a minute.

I'm not giving back this money.

Oh no, I don't want

the money back.

Do you want to make another $5?

What do I have to do?

I want you to go and

buy me the largest

cup of coffee that they have

in Southern California.

Ok?

Ok. Great!

And, uh, I need one

real sugar. Say it.

Real sugar.

Yes, and just a drop of milk.

You know what, no milk.

Just take the cup

and say "Moo" over top of it.

Ok. That's very good but

save it for when it counts.

How am I supposed to

buy you the coffee?

Crazy, I don't know

if you noticed

but I just gave you $5.

But you didn't give me money

for the actual coffee.

I don't know you well enough

to go and buy you a coffee.

We're not friends like that.

You know what,

I have one friend.

That's how I got trapped

in that stupid truck.

So look, I'm certainly not

looking for another.

Let's review. I gave you

$5 to go away.

Now that $5 is yours to

keep no matter what.

You put that

straight into your IRA.

This new $5that

is to go buy my coffee.

When you return,

with the coffee,

I'm going to give you your $5.

Do I get to keep the change?

No.

Yeah. Why not?

Because I said so

and I'm too mean to ever

change my mind.

What are you,

trying to seduce-

I don't understand.

Just go and get coffee!

You're a believer aren't you?

You believe? Oh God.

You know what? No.

I think I can honestly

say I'm just not a believer...

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes