Father Figures Page #3

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You can't tell people

how to freak out.

Now I want everybody

to calm down, all right?

I am so sorry, you guys,

but the light is

going quickly.

It's the last chance

for family photos.

Not a good time, Annie!

It's a perfect time, Annie.

Okay, just get

a little bit tighter

and we'll get

a nice family shot.

Oh, you guys look so good.

Hold on.

- This looks perfect.

- (CAMERA CLICKS)

Oh, so good!

That is going to be

a good one.

You can't leave just yet.

We need Mom and her sons.

Oh, good idea.

Okay. Come back up here.

I'm gonna need you guys

looking forward,

big smiles.

Perfect, Kyle.

Oh, my God, Dr. Reynolds...

This means he's out there.

He's out there somewhere.

Not now, Peter.

Dr. Reynolds, if I can get you

looking at the camera.

He's been out there

this whole time.

That is true. I mean,

who do you think it was?

As we got older, surely...

Was there someone that we

started to remind you of?

Just stop it.

Will you just please stop it.

None of the men I was with

would have made a good father.

I was trying to protect you.

Protect yourself more like it.

Hey, wait a minute.

I need a name.

I think you owe me a name.

I think you...

ANNIE:
Hey, Reynolds!

Camera! Now!

- (CAMERA CLICKS)

- Perfect.

We got it.

F***ing thank you.

I can't talk

about this now, Peter.

Okay, she... Mom has spoken.

Pete, you're spinning

out of control literally.

Just calm down.

Stop telling me to calm down!

Okay?

I just need to know this!

Just give me something.

Please.

Terry Bradshaw.

Four-time Super Bowl champion,

Terry Bradshaw?

Yeah.

The Enterprise Rent-A-Car

spokesman, Terry Bradshaw?

Fox sports TV commentator,

Terry Bradshaw?

Yep. Terry Bradshaw.

No, no, no.

(STAMMERS) That's insane!

We started dating

the fall of '74,

just after he gave up

his starting position

to Joe Gilliam.

There's no way she would know

who Joe Gilliam was.

Pete!

Wait, Mom, this is...

Do you realize

how incredible this is?

This is the guy

you loved growing up!

Gene, he had every poster

on the wall!

- I know...

- Can I get a smile now?

Now, will you relax?

- I love Terry Bradshaw.

- I know!

PETER:
He's the greatest!

- KYLE:
Yeah.

- Yup.

Which raises

the inevitable question,

why did you not

tell us

that the coolest man on Earth

was our father?

Well, he wasn't

the man you saw on TV.

He was violent.

He hit you?

No.

But as a football player

he was frequently violent.

As a football player?

Yeah, on Sundays.

Sometimes Monday nights.

Oh, on game days

he was violent... I got it.

Yeah, because

that was his job.

That's what he did

for a living!

(CHUCKLES)

Oh, my God!

Do you have any idea what

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