Captain Newman, M.D. Page #3

I'll do anything in the Navy.

I'll swab the decks,

I'll take top deck ack-ack,

I'll stay down in the sub.

You got to fix it.

You, please,

got to get me out of here.

Please.

We need a little more time.

Why don't you tell

the lieutenant here

that you didn't really

want him to drop dead?

Hmm?

I'm sorry, Lieutenant.

I... I take it all back.

I don't want you

to drop dead.

See, I'm apologizing, Doc.

Attaboy.

Would it help any

if he could see

his brother?

It might, except he

doesn't have a brother.

Well, Bobby.

So what's the good

word today?

That's right.

Try.

Come on, Bobby.

Let Captain Newman hear

how nicely you can say it.

You said "hello"

for me this morning.

Remember?

He did, Doc.

I heard him say "hello"

plain as anything.

It'll come, Bobby.

Morning, Captain.

How you feeling?

I got a few pains.

You know, right here.

Captain, you're

not eating right.

How'd you sleep?

All right.

Any bad dreams, Captain?

The usual.

Dry. That's good.

No sweat.

That's the first thing

to look for, right?

You're handling your

tensions better, boy.

Nurse, give this patient

and a high colonic.

He's a good boy.

(CHUCKLlNG)

Just a little wacky.

Thinks he's a captain.

Thinks he's a psychiatrist.

Well, it's all that stuff

you've got me on, Carrozzo.

It gives me

delusions of grandeur.

(MlMlCKlNG MACHlNE GUN FlRlNG)

Stop it! Stop it!

Stop it!

Stop it!

(ALL SHOUTlNG)

It's all right.

It's all right.

Come on. Attaboy.

BLODGETT:
Come on,

back to your beds.

Get that little yellow-belly

out of here. He makes me sick.

That "little yellow-belly,"

as you call him,

racked up 26 missions.

Now, what the devil

have you done,

except beat up on

some kid half your size?

It's tough enough

around here without...

Baloney!

All you do is beef,

bulldoze and feel sorry

for yourself.

Now when are you

gonna wise up?

The next time this

character pulls

something like that,

you bring him

to my office.

Can't a guy have

any fun around here?

Not that kind.

Now look,

I'm stuck with you

and you're stuck with me.

One of us

has got to change,

and it's going

to be you.

Okay, Doc.

Thanks, Gavoni.

Hey, Doc.

I got that orderly.

We've been playing gin

and he's beating

my brains out.

Well, never mind about that.

I'll pick up the tab.

Just send him in.

Fine.

I'd better get

squared away.

Thanks for the tour.

Roger.

Yeah. By all means.

Roger.

(KNOCKlNG ON DOOR)

Come in.

Good morning.

Well, what's your name?

Leibowitz.

First name?

Jackson.

Sit down.

How old are you?

Twenty-seven.

I believe that it's

customary for a soldier

to address an officer

as "sir."

Sir.

Well, what's customary

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