Bad Moms Page #3

I have four kids.

Okay, good. Please move along.

Thank you.

Emergency PTA

meeting tonight.

Thank you

for inviting me.

Oh, my God. She just got all

her sadness all over me.

Oh, sh*t!

Here comes

the hot widower.

Hey, Jessie.

Hey, guys.

VICKY:
Hi.

GWENDOLYN:
Hi.

Cute backpack

you got there.

Oh, yeah.

Uh, I'm such an Elsa.

(ALL LAUGHING)

You're hilarious!

You really are!

God, he's so

f***ing hot.

Here you go.

VICKY:
I know.

I'm so glad his wife died.

You know what? I saw him install a

car seat yesterday in two seconds.

I'm tellin' you, it was like

boom, boom, click. (MOANING)

It was so hot.

Oh, gosh.

You know what? I think I'd

let him put it in my butt.

I mean, in theory, I'm not

really into the butt thing,

but I would let him

go to town back there.

I'm with you.

Emergency PTA meeting.

AMY:
Okay, I got four minutes

to get Roscoe to the vet,

so I love you kids, get out,

get out, get out, get out.

I love you so much.

I'm so sorry.

Bye, Mom.

(GASPS)

Oh!

Oh, my God! Oh!

F***, it's so hot!

Can you roll down...

Can you roll down the window?

Okay. Okay, okay.

Hey. Hey, babe, listen.

Hi.

There is a emergency PTA

meeting today at 5:00.

It should be about

two to three hours.

Awesome. Awesome.

Okay?

Your dog's wearing a helmet.

Okay, I know.

Yes, it's... Thank you.

Okay.

F***!

Your dog has vertigo.

That can't be a thing.

And you are gonna have to

carry him until he gets home.

Are you shitting me

right now?

I don't sh*t.

But he will, uncontrollably,

for the next 36 hours.

(WHINING)

I'm here.

I'm here. Amy's here.

You missed

the meeting, bro.

Oh, no.

F***, f***, f***,

f***, f***.

(INDISTINCT)

(PANTING)

(GASPS)

(TIRES SCREECH)

I know, I know.

I'm sorry, I'm late.

Get in, get in, get in.

I can't believe I'm gonna be late

to my first soccer practice.

Baby, I'm doing

the best that I can.

Yeah, that's what

makes it even sadder.

Oh, God.

Hey, Dylan. Hey, honey.

How was your day?

I swallowed

a pen cap again.

Oh, God.

DYLAN:
Ooh!

Crap.

Was that a hit-and-run?

Nope.

Nope.

That was nothing.

Jane, go!

Go, go, go, go!

Excuse me, Coach?

I'm so sorry that Jane is late.

It is all my fault.

You look wrecked.

You having a bad day?

Oh, God, it literally

could not get any...

Ah! (GRUNTS)

Sh*t.

(GROANS)

(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)

Hey...

Hi, guys! Guys, um...

For those of you who have been

living under a rock... (CHUCKLES)

I am Gwendolyn James.

I am the president

of the PTA,

but most importantly,

I am the proud mommy

to two beautiful daughters,

Blaire and Gandhi.

Now, I called this

emergency PTA meeting

to address an issue that radically

affects the safety of our children.

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