Ask Me Anything Page #2

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to talk about yourself.

What's your favourite number?

69.

Sometimes 96.

Have you ever kissed someone

and regretted it?

Yes. Tom Lovelace,

who was 16 when I was 11.

My fist tongue kiss.

It felt like a worm.

I want it all to end

Being loved by you

Hold me now

Make it stop

The butterflies

won't go away

Do you believe in the horoscope?

No. Sagittarians never do.

I am lost

Make me found

Stop right there!

Don't even put it up.

Have I got the girl for you?

Is that so?

Come in.

What happened to Jonas?

I bought him out,

lock stock and barrel.

You have so many more books.

I used to buy my dad

his birthday and

Christmas presents here.

He's a sports writer.

Well, he used to be.

Now he just drinks.

Sam Johnson's Book Shop.

Nice to meet you, Sam.

No, I'm not Sam.

He died a long time ago.

Dr. Samuel Johnson wrote the

first great English dictionary.

Is he your hero?

Among many.

Are you a lover of books?

I could be.

Glenn Warburg.

Katie Kampenfelt.

Three days a week, $12 an hour.

Wow!

And it's butt-easy.

All I have to do

is help customers

while Glenn runs

the online business.

Sweetie, I got to hand it

to you, that was fast.

You did it.

Yup, I am indeed impressive.

Does Glenn have a last name?

Warburg.

Is he married?

Why? You think

he only hired me

so he could have

sexual intercourse with me?

It crossed my mind.

Your moustache is heinous.

I've only been blogging

for 16 days,

but I already get between 450

and 500 discreet visitors a day.

The most popular search terms

that people use to find me

are "high school," "college,"

"blond," "sex," and "oral sex,"

which means many of you

are lonely, disgusting pigs.

I also know a lot of you

are just normal people

who want to read the true-life

confessions of a tee...

What?

It's me.

Come in.

Boyfriend invasion.

Stand by.

I thought you had band practice.

Casey had a midterm.

You know, Wong,

I don't know which is worse.

Watching you eat

or watching you at work.

I'm perfectly able to do anything I want...

None of you care that I cheat on Rory,

but for some reason you hate

that it's with an older guy

who has a girlfriend.

Well, I had no clue

about Martina

until after the third time

Dan and I fooled around,

and I found her birth control

in a bathroom drawer.

By then it was too late.

I was in it.

Hold on...

Oh, God.

Oh, wow, you're so hot.

Oh, God, I love you.

Oh, God. Oh!

Oh, God... Ah!

Oh!

I think I just came.

Was I supposed to pull out?

Six o'clock.

Hey, so it is.

$288 cash with a two-dollar bill

for good luck.

Good first week?

Amazing.

And I almost finished Who Has

Changed and Who Is Dead.

Thank you

for the recommendation.

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