All American Christmas Carol

Synopsis: Living for fun, shouldering no responsibilities and trolloping around in a drunken haze with any guy who'll have her, Cindy Wegman is trailer park trash through and through - so much so that when one of her kids' fathers dies and returns to herald the coming of three Christmas spirits to guide her towards redemption (ala Dickens' 'A Christmas Carol'), she only gets the trashy sort she deserves.
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Ron Carlson
Production: August Heart Entertainment
  1 win.
 
IMDB:
4.6
NOT RATED
Year:
2013
88 min
Website
37 Views


THIS YEAR. -BABY, YOU SHOULDN'T USE

THAT KIND OF LANGUAGE IN FRONT OF THE KIDS. -WHAT? "SCREW'S"

NOT A BAD WORD, WAYNE. HEY, CAN YOU, UM,

PUT ALL THIS ON YOUR TAB? -CIND, I GOT TO PAY

YOUR RENT TOMORROW, AND CHRISTMAS IS RIGH AROUND THE CORNER, AND WINK'S NOT BEEN GIVING ME

THE OVERTIME HOURS THAT I NEED. -PLEASE? -OKAY. -[ CHUCKLES ] [ ROCK MUSIC PLAYS ] - ON THE 12th DAY OF CHRISTMAS,

MY TRUE LOVE SENT TO ME 12 DRUMMERS DRUMMING,

11 PIPERS PIPING 10 LORDS A-LEAPING,

9 LADIES DANCING 8 MAIDS A-MILKING,

7 SWANS A-SWIMMING 6 GEESE A-LAYING 5 GOLDEN RINGS 4 CALLING BIRDS,

3 FRENCH HORNS 2 TURTLEDOVES AND A PARTRIDGE

IN A PEAR TREE -CINDY, CAN WE TURN THE LIGHTS

ON THE TREE THIS YEAR? -NO, BABY, IT'S TOO EXPENSIVE. -THIS CHRISTMAS IS GONNA SUCK --

JUST LIKE THE REST OF THEM. -HEY! DON'T SASS ME. BESIDES,

I AIN'T NEVER READ ANYWHERE THAT CHRISTMAS

HAS TO HAVE LIGHTS. YOU KNOW, THE STARS IN THE SKY WAS ALL THEY HAD

BACK IN THE DAY. -BUT --

-BUT NOTHING. ZIP IT. -DON'T ZIP ME.

YOU AIN'T MY MAMA. RANDY'S MY DADDY. -ZIP IT, OR GO BACK

TO YOUR OWN TRAILER. -[GRUNTS] -THANK YOU, CONSTANTINE. YOU MAY BE DEAD,

BUT YOU'LL LIVE ON FOREVER, HERE ON THE

"MASTERS OF MUSIC." WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK. -DANG. [ ROCK MUSIC PLAYS ] -[ SIGHS ] -HOW FAR CAN THAT THING SHOOT? -WELL, IT, UH, DEPENDS

ON THE TRAJECTORY OF THE PIPE. DO YOU KNOW

WHAT TRAJECTORY MEANS? -NO. -[ SIGHS ] IT'S THE ANGLE

AT WHICH A FLYING OBJECT TRAVELS THROUGH THE AIR -- MOST COMMONLY USED BY,

UH, BALLISTICS EXPERTS, BUT CAN BE APPLIED

TO PAINTBALL, AND, UH...OF COURSE,

SANTA'S SLEIGH. -OH, YEAH. OF COURSE.

EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT. [ ROCK MUSIC CONTINUES ] [ ENGINE SHUTS OFF ] -HEY, LOOK AT YOU ALL GROWN UP.

[ CHUCKLES ] -HEY, RANDY. -SHOOT-DANG, RANDY. I SAW YOUR MATCH ON TV

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Ron Carlson

Ron Carlson (born 1947) is an American novelist and short story writer. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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