9 Dead Gay Guys Page #2

It's for him as well.

Yeah.

C'mon, mate.

He's my long lost brother, right?

We just need a bit of drink to celebrate, OK?

I ain't serving you, or your h-block long lost brother

here.

And now I can't serve you compassionately this side of

Do you get me?

Now, a bottle of Black Death, please?

What the f*** is that?

It's a cattle prod!

It's a Class 5 Offensive Weapon.

Byron, you're a f***ing arsehole, you know that?

That's a mouth now! Just get it, right?

Try coming in before 11, sometime?

It's a lot easier that way.

Where'd you get this thing anyway?

I found it.

What do you mean, you found it?

I mean I found it.

Last night.

A lot of things happened last night,

didn't they?

What?

Look, don't "What" me, all right?

What exactly happened last night,

that's what.

Nothing happened last night.

I was in the back room, that's all.

The back room?

What the freak is a back room?

The back room,

Otherwise known as a dark room,

Otherwise known as the play room,

was aptly named.

It was in the back,

it was dark as shite,

and it was full of boys

playing with each other's toys.

Not that I would ever call it that, no

Giving a guy a blow job for money

was what I called legitimate, lucrative work.

Giving a guy a blow job while stealing his money

was what I called illegitimate, lucrative work.

This was the illegitimate variety.

Only the guy didn't have any money.

This cattle prod killed the queen.

What?

The guy you stole this frigging cattle

prod from

electrocuted the queen to death.

You think so?

You know he did!

You mean to tell me,

you gave a murderer a blow job?

It was detox week, Kenny.

He was a murderer, Byron!

I freaking didn't know

that he was a murderer at the time, Kenny!

Most cases you stick your hand down a guy's pocket

you expect to find a wallet,

not a fricking cattle prod!

You know you're gonna have to go to the police.

You're gonna have to hand it in.

It's a piece of evidence.

And what would you like me to tell them?

'Ah, could I have a description of the

murderer please?'

Oh, he had a 3-inch willy, sir.

He had a 3-inch willy?

Aye.

You ever been in a dark room, Kenny?

It's dark as shite, can't see f***-all.

This murderer, I know he had a 3-inch willy

and that's about all I know about him.

Well if it was that dark, Byron

How did you even know that?

It wasn't even as long as my fist.

Finding your best mate broke,

and back on the booze,

was probably bad enough already.

But finding out that he's been blowing queers

to subsidize his booze is presumably worse.

However, finding out that the queen's been

electrocuted

by a gay guy with a cattle prod

and a 3-inch willy

was really queer news, ain't it?

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