What to Expect When You're Expecting Page #6

A little nausea. Some heartburn.

And my b*obs are killing me.

Plus, I have to pee every five minutes.

But it's just proof

that a miracle is happening inside of me.

So I'm so happy.

It is a miracle, isn't it?

I mean, I thought I'd have to

give up my Pilates, and my running

- and tennis and my strip-aerobics.

- Sure.

Oh, and kickboxing, just all my activities.

But it just turns out

I have all this extra energy.

- You know? You know?

- Oh, yeah.

Plus,

I'm like crazy-horny.

- Okay. Okay.

- I mean,

if I even get a whiff of Ramsey,

it's like I just have to pounce, you know?

And I gotta give this old boy credit.

He's still got that race car engine

that can go the distance.

- Hormones. What're you gonna do?

- Yeah. Yeah.

I don't know.

Maybe not talk about it at brunch?

WENDY:
Yep, that's what I'd do.

GARY:
That's what I'd do, too.

- (GRUNTING)

- We're on the same page on that one.

Honey, I know you can't have any

- so I'm gonna do one for you and the baby.

- The baby!

Sweet.

- Here's to the Coopers.

- Yeah, you know what, what the hell.

- WENDY:
Yeah.

- (COUGHS)

Well, that was delicious.

Honey, I didn't make any of it.

You know Ramsey don't want me cooking.

- Your mom and I...

- Not my mom.

We sure wish y'all could stay longer.

Yeah. That's the thing. It's such a bummer,

but the missus

and little Mini Cooper and I,

we have an appointment.

- Yes, at...

- Walmart.

- For paint.

- Yeah. And mulch.

Well, you know what they say.

Money isn't everything,

but sure keeps you connected to your kids.

- So how much you need?

- Dad, I don't need any money.

- I don't need any money.

- Come on. How much you need?

No, I don't need anything at all.

Thank you so much.

- Man pats.

- Man pats, that's great.

Come here, baby, give your mama a kiss.

- What?

- Okay...

- Baby.

- Okay.

My baby boy. I'm so proud of you.

You've grown up so fast.

Okay, Gary. Gar.

- What? Yeah.

- Okay.

- Awesome. This was so much...

- All right. We'll see y'all later.

Yeah, great, this was a thing, you know?

- Congratulations!

- Yeah, congrats.

RAMSEY:
Come back soon!

WENDY:
Don't ever kiss her again.

MARCO:
Well, um...

Okay. Are you sure you took the test right?

You pee on a stick. It's idiot-proof.

No, I know. It's just, you know, one time.

ROSIE:
Yeah.

So what do you want to do?

I don't know.

What do you want to do?

Look, I don't know.

I just found out, okay? You're the girl.

Don't you get to decide?

Great, great. So then it's all on me?

No. No, I didn't mean...

Sh*t. Should we get married?

"Sh*t. Should we get married?" Yeah.

No, it's just,

when you put it like that, that's...

Oh. I'm sorry, Rosie.

Rate this script:3.0 / 1 vote