War, Inc.

Synopsis: A political satire set in Turaqistan, a country occupied by an American private corporation run by a former US Vice President. In an effort to monopolize the opportunities the war-torn nation offers, the corporation's CEO hires a troubled hit man, to kill a Middle East oil minister. Now, struggling with his own growing demons, the assassin must pose as the corporation's Trade Show Producer in order to pull off this latest hit, while maintaining his cover by organizing the high-profile wedding of Yonica Babyyeah, an outrageous Middle Eastern pop star, and keeping a sexy left wing reporter in check.
Director(s): Joshua Seftel
Production: First Look Pictures
  1 nomination.
 
IMDB:
5.7
Metacritic:
37
Rotten Tomatoes:
30%
R
Year:
2008
107 min
$515,643
Website
33 Views

1

Can I have a shot glass, please?

Photo sent.

Stay on this heading for about 6h30min.

Turn left at the Aurora Borealis.

When you see something that looks like

a frozen gall bladder, that's Greenland.

Hang a soft right there.

- All set there, Mr. Hauser?

- Yeah, thank you.

Guidestar!

Guidestar!

Welcome back.

Hotel? Dinner reservations? Movie tickets, maybe?

Mr. Hauser Is there something else you need?

I don't know. I feel...

Go on.

Like a refuge from the Island of Dr. Moreau.

Some morally inverted, twisted

character from a Celine novel.

The hot sauce helps.

You still getting those nightmares you told me about?

They're coming back faster and faster. I

don't know if I can keep outrunning 'em.

That'll be it, Jerry. I gotta go.

You bet, Mr. Hauser. GuideStar wants you to feel secure.

GuideStar.

Be still my trembling hands, for how you would tremble...

if you knew where I would take you next.

Incoming message.

Incoming message.

You got him on the comm there? Bring it over.

Hello, Hauser!

Hello, Mr. Vice President.

I haven't been vice president for five months.

Otherwise, this all might be a conflict of interest.

Tamerlane and the U.S. government,

and I in particular, were cleared...

of any and all violations of federal,

state and international laws...

by the bipartisan committee.

Just read the report.

I'm sure anything you weren't supposed

to be doing you were cleared of.

And of course I was preemptively

pardoned by the president.

I got the snapshots. Love your work.

- We're all big fans.

- Yes.

Let's see if the damn Krauts...

will cross us in the Security Council now.

We seem to be heading southeast. Where am I going?

Hope you like the smell of fresh liberation.

Give me a sec.

I gotta growler down there the size of a cane frog.

Turaqistan.

What's the gig?

Omar Sharif.

- Omar Sharif?

- Yeah.

The CEO of Ugi Gas, the Ugikistani conglomerate.

He is building a pipeline through his country.

We didn't liberate Turaqistan

to get hustled by a fez head.

Terminate.

Do do that voodoo that you do so well.

You'll be working directly under the

viceroy just appointed by the president.

His identity is still being withheld

on a need to know basis.

- And no one needs to know.

- He asked for you personally.

- What's my cover?

- Trade show producer.

Trade show? What show? What show?

It's gonna be huge.

Tamerlane is sponsoring a trade expo, Brand USA.

It's our big launch bringing democracy

to this part of the world.

We've bombed the shit out of them,

there's a lot of rebuilding to do.

- Shows a nice spirit.

- Somebody has to help them.

This is a great opportunity for Tamerlane and the U.S.

Not to mention the people of Turaqistan.

And to top it all off, there's gonna

be a gala wedding. Isn't that great?

Seems like a pretty elaborate cover. I'm

gonna be responsible for all that shit?

This is a historic moment.

The first war ever to be 100%

outsourced to private enterprise.

Tamerlane jets, Tamerlane tanks, Tamerlane soldiers.

And to top it all off, the Brand USA expo.

It's your show, baby.

Welcome to the Turaqi Green Zone, sir.

Tamerlane welcomes Expo Turaqistan, Brand USA.

Welcome to Turaqistan, sir. I'm Marsha Dillon...

hoping you're ready to kill.

I've been briefed.

SPF-Eighty-seven, sir.

- Shall we?

- Yes.

It all looks good.

Great lights.

Take out the Tamercard.

What's your cover, by the way?

Undergrad Wharton with a masters in

communication at the Annenberg School.

- Very impressive.

- Well, it's fake.

- Tell me that's not the stage?

- I think it is.

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Mark Leyner

Mark Leyner (born 1956) is an American postmodernist author. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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