Unseen + Untold: National Lampoon's Animal House Page #4

---

Your days are numbered at Faber.

You and all your sick Delta buddies.

Meantime, your ass belongs to me.

Now, drop and give me 20.

But...

Hit it!

Trooper, baby.

Come here, baby.

Cutie-pie.

I want these quarters standing tall

by 0900 tomorrow.

You got that?

Yes, sir.

Brother D-Day, brother Bluto.

You hate that ying-yang?

- Who?

- Neidermeyer. You hate his guts?

- I guess so.

- You guess so?

Yes, I hate him! I hate his guts!

We have an old saying in Delta.

"Don't get mad, get even."

Nice horsey. Good. Let's go.

He's in there!

Boy, is this great!

Now finish it, Flounder.

Are you kidding?

I never shot anything before in my life.

- I thought you hated Neidermeyer's guts.

- I do.

And the horse? Is there anything in

the world you hate as much as that horse?

Get it over with.

- Just blanks, right?

- Right.

- Holy sh*t!

- There were blanks in that gun!

- I didn't even point the gun at him!

- Holy sh*t!

There were blanks.

- Maybe he had a heart attack.

- Holy sh*t!

If you want the homecoming parade

in my town...

you have to pay.

Carmine, I think it's wrong

to extort money from the college.

Look...

as the mayor of Faber,

I've got big responsibilities.

These parades are very expensive.

You're using my police...

my sanitation people, my free Oldsmobiles.

If you mention extortion again...

I'll have your legs broken.

I'm sure I can arrange a nice honorarium

from the student fund.

Another thing.

You better sit

on that zoo fraternity of yours.

I don't want no drunken riots in my town.

Don't worry. I've got those boys

just where I want them.

We'll have the best homecoming parade

Faber's ever had.

Mandy!

- I haven't seen you since we...

- Go away.

I can only stay a minute.

Let me buy you lunch.

You've got your lunch.

How about some milk?

You got your milk, too.

Can I just massage your thighs

while you eat?

Do I have to leave?

Is this any way to treat an intimate friend?

I asked you never to speak to me again.

Will you go away?

I do hope we're not interrupting anything.

If you must know...

- Eric was just leaving.

- I wasn't.

I could make you leave, if you...

Bluto!

I think you know everybody here.

Greg, can't you...

Don't worry. Just keep your hands and feet

away from his mouth.

Don't you have any respect for yourself?

This is absolutely gross!

That boy is a P-l-G, pig!

See if you can guess...

what I am now.

I'm a zit. Get it?

All right, you bastard. Let's go, right here!

Why don't we go out tonight?

Don't flatter yourself. It wasn't that great.

Food fight!

Oh, Greg.

Look. It's a star.

Let's make a wish.

- "Star light, star bright..."

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes