Tim and Eric's Billion Dollar Movie Page #4

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Let's go.

You cannot

look behind you

Oh, no, you can't

There's too much ahead

that excites you

Yes, there is

Just like two horses

Just like

two horses

Two horses

Running in the wind.

Hi, this is Tim and Eric.

Sorry we're not

here right now.

We've left town to become

business members.

We are now Dobis.

Please leave a message

for Dobis.

Be blessed.

Sh*t.

Son of a b*tch.

They just skipped town

on us, Tommy.

- You find them.

- Mm-hmm.

Find them if it's

the last thing you do.

I want to drink their blood.

- I want to take a knife and gut them!

- Yes.

Oh, God, let me watch

their insides fall out.

Yes. Yes. Yes.

What else, Tommy?

- I want to strap them up--

- Yes.

And let a bamboo tree grow

right up into their ass, huh?

Yes.

Until the tree grows straight

through their brains!

Yes. And I will

deliver them unto you.

I want to eat

their f***ing hearts!

Yeah!

Yes. Yes. Yes.

Okay.

Tell me what you think.

Uh, "Dear Mr. Weebs,

We are very, very, very,

very excited to meet you.

We are Dobis."

That's all I've got so far.

What do you think?

Oh, I'm sorry, dude.

I wasn't listening to you.

I'm just so focused

on this ridiculous look.

It's not working anymore.

Let me take a look.

It's just not right.

You know what, Eric, if we're

going to be businessmen,

I think maybe we should

look like businessmen, too.

- I agree.

- Hold on a second.

Now hold still.

Goodbye.

Oh!

Good night, Katie.

I miss you, my sweets.

Boy, you're really getting

attached to that photo, bud.

Tim, it's not

just a picture, man.

That could be

the girl of my dreams.

All right. Let's just

try to stay focused

on what's important here.

Ever since I saw you

in that commercial, Katie,

I felt this electricity

in my heart.

I can't wait to meet you

and make love to you

and go deep inside you

and show you my mushroom tip.

All right, well,

I'm hitting the sack.

Oh.

What the hell?

Okay.

- Katie.

- Okay.

All right.

You want to finish

that in the bathroom?

Almost done.

Almost done.

Okay. Well, I'm gonna

say good night, then.

Just like two horses

Just like

two horses

Two horses

Runnin' in the wind

Runnin' in the wind

Runnin' in the wind.

We've come

a long way, Tim.

We could turn around

right now if you want.

No.

I'm ready.

All right.

Let's go.

Hello?

Mr. Weebs?

Mr. Weebs?

Mr. Weebs?

Hello?

- What? What the--

- Mr. Weebs?

Go to heck!

- Whoa!

- Who is that, Taquito?

No, sir.

It's Dobis.

- It's Tim and Eric.

- Tim and Eric.

Oh.

- Oh. Come in.

- Thank you.

Yeah. Come in.

- Tim and Eric. Hello.

- Hi. Sorry to spook you.

- Good to meet you.

- Hi. Come in.

Hi. Hi.

I did not expect you guys.

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