Something's Gotta Give

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The sweet, uncomplicated

satisfaction of the younger woman.

That fleeting age when everything

just falls right into place.

It's magic time, and it can

render any man...

...anywhere, absolutely helpless.

Some say I'm an expert

on the younger woman.

Guess that's because I've been

dating them for over 40 years.

So, baby, you're rich?

We||, my mother is. Sort of.

I mean, not really.

If she lives within a mile

of here, she's rich.

Well, I guess a hit play will

buy you a house in the Hamptons.

- I'd like to meet your mother.

- No, you wouldn't.

She's great. She's totally brilliant,

but she's not your type.

You're overlooking

one of the great things about me.

I don't have a type.

She's over 30.

Oh, what?

Like you don't know you

have a slight reputation for...

- For?

- For...

...never dating anyone over 30.

It just so happens, my dear, that

women of a certain age don't date me.

You ever think of it that way? No.

It's always me.

Hey.

I'll call back Monday.

Say you couldn't find me.

Who?

I'll call her later.

No, no, I have the number.

Yeah.

Make a right.

It's the second driveway on the left.

Right.

Wow.

It's the perfect beach house.

So...

...what are we gonna do out here,

just the two of us, for two whole days?

Tell me the truth.

Are you at all glad we waited?

Truth?

No.

But I'm extremely glad

we're finally gonna...

Wanna go for a swim?

How long will it take you

to change?

- Thirty seconds.

- Really?

That long?

Oh, Har, by the way,

no smoking in the house.

My mom doesn't allow it.

But she allows you to

strip in the front yard?

Bring guys you're

dating here to...?

She doesn't know everything I do

or when I do it or where I do it.

Okay.

The fabulous two-story living room...

...which, I predict, we will spend

absolutely no time in whatsoever.

- It's a knockout.

- Thank you.

I'm very good at giving this tour,

by the way, although...

...I've never actually done

it while taking off my clothes.

Behind me, the requisite

Hamptons deck...

...complete with

pool and ocean view.

Your pants, please.

Ladies first.

When I first started auctioneering,

someone told me...

...if I was nervous, I should just picture

the audience in their underwear.

This gives that a whole new meaning.

You're not nervous now, are you?

- I'm always a little nervous.

- Put on your bathing suit.

I brought us champagne.

I'll put it on ice.

No, I know. I can't do anything...

Oh, God! What is this?

Okay.

Okay, you stay where you are.

We have a knife.

- Do you live here?

- Look, mister.

I am gonna dial 911,

and you are not gonna move.

- Zoe, hand me the phone.

- You don't understand.

- I'm your daughter's friend.

- Don't think so.

My daughter is in the city. You, what,

wander in here, high on ecstasy?

- Honestly, if you'd just...

- No!

Stay there.

I was in the Israeli army.

I can break you in half.

Hello. Yes! Yes, I have

an intruder in my house.

29 Daniels Lane, Sagaponack...

I'm dating your daughter, Marin.

She invited me here for the weekend.

She's in her room right now, changing.

You're dating my daughter?

Now, who would have thought

that would be worse news?

Yeah, sorry. False alarm.

No, he's not a burglar.

- He's dating my daughter.

- I had no idea you were coming.

You said you had to write.

I do, but I thought

I would do it out here.

I should have told you

I was bringing someone.

I'm sorry. I should've told

you we were coming.

Obviously. Anyway, here we are.

Hello, I'm the mother.

Harry Sanborn. How are you?

Oh, God, sorry.

This is my friend Harry.

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