Slap Her... She's French Page #3

about charities and stuff.

It makes people

not hate you.

Which reminds me...

These are

some old clothes

I'm giving to the...

Something thrift store,

either for breast cancer

or burn victims.

What is this?

Oh, it's a checklist--

50 steps to become

abc's $6-million woman

and host of

good morning, America.

What's the junior

anchorperson competition?

Oh, it's, like,

a contest

where everyone

picks a subject

and then makes

a video about it.

Mine's about

missing children.

My mama got it made at

a professional news studio.

Is that allowed?

Well, that's how they do it

in the big-time.

You think Katie Couric

cuts her own?

When I win,

I'm gonna use

the college

scholarship

and then it's just

a hop, skip, and a jump

to doing TV weather,

working for George or Jeb--

whoever's president

at the time--

and then

going national.

Oh, starla, your life

is so formidable,

so puissante, so chic.

Welcome to my world.

[Engine starts]

[Tires squealing]

There is no map,

there are no signs

we're on our way,

we're crossing lines

strap on your boots,

go pack your bags

no time to rest,

no time to lag

and you know

everyone here

has been invited to go

whoa-oh

and you know,

we're on our way

into the unknown

You are amazing.

It's my job to be

amazing, Genevieve,

and I take that job

very seriously.

Oh, here. Let me

carry your books.

Hey, starla.

You look great.

Hey, starla.

What's up?

It's very important

to maintain good relations

with your public.

Ashley, Tanner!

It's ok.

It's French.

Oh.

oh.

Hey, isle of lesbo

off the starboard bow.

Hey, Doreen, what

an interesting perfume.

What is that? C.K. Spam?

[Girls laughing]

Hey, beef queen.

What do you want, ed?

Let's see...

In a word, community.

And to meet

the secret weapon

that bagged

your latest crown.

Hey, leave her alone, ed.

She's new to this country.

Hi. ed Mitchell.

Oh. Genevieve leplouff.

Come on.

You can watch me

wait. you're gonna pass up

a photo op, huh?

That's right.

Front page of the school paper.

"Beef queen hosts

foreign exchange student,"

et cetera, et cetera,

ad vomitosis.

But...with

a big, fat picture.

[Sighs]

what a bore.

Well, it would be

a great way

for people to learn

about Genevieve.

So generous.

I'm touched.

So, come on. Let's see

a big, meaty smile, huh?

Bite me, you big

Manhattan poser.

I'm from Albany.

Can we shoot this puppy

while I'm still young?

No, come on. I want

Genevieve in this, too.

Oh, right.

Come on.

Oh, no. It's...

No. come on.

Ok. can you say

fromage?

Un, deux, trois...

Oh!

oh, I'm sorry.

I am so clumsy.

Je suis desol.

Not to worry.

We'll just take another.

Just think of the camera

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