Love Don't Cost a Thing Page #5

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to the Halle Berry School for Driving.

-Yeah, how you gonna fix that?

-lt's already fixed.

Oh, come on, Ted.

When homegirl is all quiet

and humble about it...

...it's because her rich

and famous boo, Mr. Dru...

...paid for all that

to be corrected immediately.

What's he gonna think

when he finds out...

...you're volunteering for special ed,

rolling with that retard, Alvin?

You're the last person to be commenting

on someone's mental health, Kadeem.

He's a grinder, not a retard.

But on the real, Paris, he carries a pool net

around town, on a motorized scooter.

You know, l don't believe

l granted an interview today.

Hey. Hey, look.

-lt doesn't add up. lt doesn't make sense.

-He cleans her pool.

l wanna clean pools.

Get to hang out with Paris Morgan.

l'll clean the bathtub too.

Yo, check this out, man.

Losers sit over there, to the left.

You feel me?

Then l guess you'll be making a right.

That's the a**hole section, Ted.

You know what?

l think l'm gonna go get some dessert.

You know, the Butterfingers

in the vending machine rock.

You know, y'all don't have to be so rude,

staring at him like that.

Why are you with him?

l'm rolling with Al

because l'm with him, okay?

Yeah.

There you are.

Come on, let's bounce.

There's a game tonight,

so scoop me up at 6:30?

l will be scooping you like Chunky Monkey.

Slide, hit six...

...and kick.

Pull. Land low.

All right. Now shake it out.

Shake it out. Good job, y'all.

-All right. Ready to have a good time?

-Give me my tape.

lt's not your tape. lt's Dad's tape.

Take your Wonderbra and get out.

And why would you need it anyway?

You know you'll never get to use it.

Oh, yeah? Well, guess what.

-Thank you.

-Mom? Alvin's taking drugs.

He's hallucinating.

He actually thinks he has a date tonight.

-Why can't he?

-With Paris Morgan?

The most beautiful girl at school?

Dad, you bugging.

-What that supposed to mean?

-Look at him.

Where's the iron?

lt's under the sink.

Are you feeling okay, honey?

Mom, l'm great.

See that? Drugs.

-Do you think maybe l should--?

-No. Look here. Let me handle this here.

He probably just needs a good

talking to, that's all.

Take it low.

-Son? Come out and talk to your father.

-Shake it out.

Shake it out. Good. Have fun with it.

Take it to the side.

Take it low. Do what you wanna do.

It's the shake-off.

Come on, take a seat.

Come on. Gotta get your sea legs. Might

wanna get yourself a waterbed one day.

There ain't a woman born

that can resist...

...the motion...

...of the ocean.

Dad, l gotta iron my clothes.

No, no, no.

Don't worry about that.

Because nothing right now can rob me...

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