Let's Be Cops Page #5

What is wrong with you?

You should have

seen your face, man!

Wow. Where did

you get this?

eBay, dude.

eBay? Yeah,

there's tons of them.

Isn't this so illegal?

No.

Well, I mean, yeah.

Putting the lights on

kind of is.

I had to do that myself.

What about the LAPD sh*t.

Got it online.

Then I went to Kinko's.

Kinko's?

Plastered it on myself.

This is crazy, dude.

Some next level sh*t

is what it is, Justin.

Some next level sh*t.

Load it up and crack a trick

I'm above the law, b*tch

Isn't that the guy who

took a sh*t on our doorstep?

He's a cop.

Everybody get down

Officers,

is there a problem?

Do you want to go

to jail tonight?

Um...

There you guys are!

What are you

talking about?

Somewhere fun.

All right!

Oh, yeah!

Damn!

Oh, no, no, no. We're real

cops. These are our guns and-

We paid $500

for your asses.

Now get up there

and shake those d*cks!

WOMAN 23 That's right!

I'm getting

f***ed tonight.

Take it off.

Come to mama.

0h. yeah!

Get your dollar

bills ready, girls.

WOMAN 23 Make it flash!

No touching!

Stop, guys!

Can I just dance?

Ew.

What?

Oh, gosh.

You get

what you pay for.

Ugh.

All right, let's do it

again. Roll up the windows.

Here we go! Here we go!

You look really different

without your uniform.

Is that a compliment

or an insult?

All right,

young lady.

I'm the cop here,

so I'll be asking

the remainder of

the questions, ma'am.

Oh, okay.

First off...

How on earth do you

not have a boyfriend?

Honestly, Justin, I have

the worst taste in men.

Thank you.

No, I mean...

I'm a psycho magnet.

I don't know.

Give me an example.

Okay-

Right now, there's this guy who keeps

coming in to my work and bothering me.

And normally, I would just

tell him to get lost...

but he's like

real deal scary.

Next time this guy

shows up at your work

you tell him

I want his number.

Seriously,

he seems like my type.

Whoa, is that real?

Yeah, it happens sometimes.

I like it.

I like you.

Listen, I gotta

tell you something.

What?

And it's gonna sound

crazy.

Officer Chang,

this is the LAPD...

I'm gonna need you to stop creeping

out that girl and get back to work.

All right!

I have to tell her.

She's too good

of a girl, man.

And now she's sitting over here

thinking I'm Denzel in Training Day.

More like Ethan Hawke.

What's that?

What are those?

Oh, this?

You sew those on?

I got promoted

to sergeant.

You promoted yourself?

Ifeelhke

I deserved it.

I don't want you getting

too weird with this.

I'm not getting

too weird, Chang!

Stop calling me Chang.

Look at your nametag.

I would love to

meet the 6-foot-1

Chinese guy that

can fit this outfit.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes