Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle

Harold and Kumar go to White Castle

Billy Boy!

Get your ass ready!

It's almost 5:
00, and this bad boy

needs to get his drink on.

- No, no, no. Give me that.

- Don't.

- I'm gonna burn it once and for all.

- Stop that.

Dude, it's been six months.

It's time to move on, okay?

Whatever. Even if

I wanted to meet other women,

I wouldn't even know what to do.

I've been out of the game

for so long.

Dude, you come out with me tonight,

I promise you will get laid.

Yeah, it sounds very tempting,

but Berenson needs me to update

these financial models

for the meeting

with the foreign investors.

So what?

It's Friday night.

The Germans are taking

an early flight back.

The meeting got changed

to tomorrow.

So? Why don't you

just get somebody else

to do your work for you?

Who?

Harold, I need you to update

those models for me.

- Billy, aren't you supposed to...

- I know. Something just came up.

I have this meeting

with these new clients tonight,

and I'm never gonna have time

to get to those.

So that's your

responsibility now, big boy.

Make sure those are in

by 9:
00 sharp tomorrow.

With all the downsizing

that's been going on around here,

we wouldn't want to have to tell Berenson

you've been slacking, now would we?

Yeah.

Okay, no problem.

Hey.

You have a great weekend,

okay, buddy?

I owe you one.

Just one.

Thank you.

Wow! That was amazing.

I cannot believe how easy that was.

Dude, how do you think

I get all my shit done?

I'm telling you, those Asian guys

love crunching numbers.

You probably

just made his weekend.

Chick magnet

Chick magnet. Chick magnet

Chick magnet. Yeah

F*ck.

An excellent point, Mr. Patel.

You are one of the finest applicants

I have ever interviewed.

Thank you.

It comes as no surprise. Your father

is highly respected in his field.

As you probably heard

from your old man,

he and I had some pretty wild times

back in med school.

Really?

Yeah. We started

our own basketball team...

the Hemoglobin Trotters.

Hemo-globin Trotters...

get it?

A play on the name of the famous

colored, Negro basketball squad...

black, African-American.

You know, people of colors.

Let's end up with one final question,

just as a formality.

What are some potential

symptoms of pancreatitis?

Well, you would have

epigastric tenderness,

diffuse abdominal tenderness...

I'm sorry.

Can you hold on one second?

Kumar's phone.

Kumar speaking.

Hey, what's up? It's me.

What are you doing?

Nothing important. I can talk.

What's going on?

Listen, I can't party tonight, okay?

I gotta stay late at the office.

Dude, f*ck that shit.

We had plans.

I know, but I got

a lot of work to do.

When has getting high ever

prevented you from doing your work?

Jesus!

Believe me.

I would love to come home. Okay?

- I got a lot of work to do.

- Thank you. I'll do that.

I got a quarter of the

finest herb in New York City.

I'm not smoking

that shit alone, okay?

So you need to just chill the f*ck out

and prepare to get blazed

because in the next couple of hours,

I expect both of us to be

blitzed out of our skulls, got it?

All right, I got it.

I'll talk to you later.

Where was I?

We've got the severe anal discharge,

sometimes violent... a.k.a. Diarrhea.

Mr. Patel, I am more than familiar

with diarrhea.

Do you actually believe

after the way you've just behaved

that I would ever even consider

recommending you for admission?

No. I'm gonna

be honest with you.

The only reason I'm applying

is so my dad

will keep paying for my apartment.

I really don't have a desire

to go to med school.

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