Grandma's Boy Page #4

Hey, at least I have a bush.

- Sh*t's weak!

- Oh, hey, Samantha. Sorry you had to hear that.

No. Congratulations

on having a bush.

How do you two

know each other?

I woke him up here this morning.

He fell asleep working late last night.

Yeah, well, that's what old people do.

They fall asleep.

Wow,J.P., that is a great outfit.

How much do clothes cost

in the Matrix?

So funny I forgot to laugh.

Hi, I'm Jeff. I have a bush too.

It's not gray.

- Hey!

- What?

My bush isn't really gray.

- Not according to my mom.

- I thought I told you to quit talking about that.

- People keep asking me about it.

- Um-

I'm really sorry to have to leave

this conversation, but I will see you guys later.

Get back to work, testers.

Hey, Samantha, don't take the red pill!

Adios, turd nuggets.

Wow.

Hey, Timmy, any chance I can

crash on your couch tonight?

Why? So you can

jerk off on my mom?

Jeff's a f***ing liar, Timmy!

What's that?

How many people did you tell

about the incident with me and your mom?

Thirteen, maybe. Why?

I didn't know it was a secret.

No, you're right.

Your mom would really appreciate it.

- My bad. Sorry.

- It's all right.

So where are you going to

crash tonight?

Um, this, uh- This really cute chick

I've known for a long time...

...said that I could sleep over

with her and her two crazy girlfriends.

- No way!

- Yep.

Three chicks and you?

Yeah. I'll call you later

and let you know which bed I end up in.

- Totally. Oh, my roommate's here. Later, 'gator.

- Later.

- Hi, honey.

- Hi, Mommy.

- Did you have a good day?

- I did. Did you remember to TiVo SamuraiJack?

I did.

Oh, honey, they work you too hard there.

- That's a long day.

- It's not that tough of a job, though, Grandma. But thank you.

You are something else.

You must be starving, darling.

Yeah, I could eat.

That's, uh, quite the buffet

you have there.

Thank you, Mr. President.

Oh, Grace, you remember

my grandson Alex.

Our new roommate.

- How long you staying?

- Um,just till I find a new apartment.

- Do you have a girlfriend?

- No.

- How old are you now?

- I'll be 36 in October.

My grandson's gay too.

I'll give you his number.

- I'm not gay, but thank you.

- Denial.

Wow. That Grace sure makes me

feel warm and welcome.

Well, you'd be bitter too

if you had four husbands die on you.

Probably suicides.

- I was just kidding.

- There we go. Here's your din-din.

Oh, watch- It's hot.

Ooh, be careful-

Okay, so that's chicken cutlet,

leftover lasagna...

...some scrambled eggs...

...some pudding and-

and, oh, wait a minute.

A piece of the wedding cake.

- That is awesome, Grandma. Thank you.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes