Friends: The Stuff You've Never Seen Page #3

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before you've opened the box.

- That's not right.

- I bought it.

I didn't read the box

before I opened the box.

You can't send the box back

once you open the box!

Come on.

That's right, because I'm a Tribbiani...

...and this is what we do.

Okay, we may not be great thinkers...

...or world leaders, or, or...

We may not be able to remember

what we're supposed to say.

- Oh, I'm sorry, we have to do that again.

- How could I have done that wrong?

Sometimes you can do everything right.

Everyone can wear everything... Okay.

- Read your script.

- Hush.

I knew it. I knew I wasn't crazy.

- Oh, poor Ross.

- I know.

Sorry.

Sorry.

- All right, ready.

- Have you ever seen this show?

What? I've kept all of our secrets.

I'm an excellent sepret-keeper...

What? I'm an excellent secret-keeper.

I've kept all of our secrets.

What secrets?

Ross, doesn't Ben go

to Smithfield Day School?

Yeah, wh...?

You go there too?

- You knew that was gonna happen.

- Oh, and Sherry's my... Sherry.

Wait, this shouldn't be that funny.

Hey, hey.

Action.

- Let's go. What happened?

- Everything's fine.

- What happened?

- I don't know.

- How do you know that wasn't a choice?

- Is everything okay?

Everything's fine.

How do I get into it?

It was something called

Braxton Hicks contractions.

Oh, thank God.

I don't remember the line.

"Oh, thank God," what is it?

When you beeped me...

...I was online at the concession stand

at the movie theater.

You just suck.

What happened to you?

You used to be able to act.

I know. I don't know what happened.

You were so good.

Oh, God, Chandler's

making his sex face.

Oh, God, Chandler

is doing his sex face.

Just for now, don't make any faces.

Oh, God, Chandler

is doing his sex face.

Never gonna happen.

- Hi.

- Hi.

- Whoa, one hand on the sheet, Joe.

- Oh, sorry, got you.

- You saw it, didn't you?

- I saw it.

Okay, this is it, this is it.

This is my big fight scene coming up.

Jesus.

Apparently, it's about a girl

who moves to the... Okay.

I'm naked.

- Well, what's he like?

- Well, he's tall.

- Sure.

- He's got brown hair.

A tall guy with hair similar to mine.

Oh, unknowable universe.

- He works with food.

- Oh, yeah, yeah... Oh, God.

- I know.

- What happened?

You're thrown off by the hundreds of

people not laughing at what I just said.

You can commit,

and it still doesn't matter.

I'm a headhunter.

I hook up out-of-work Soviet scientists

with rogue third-world fam... Families?

- No.

- Let's go back.

- All right, how about you, Chandler?

- Well, Joe, I'm a headhunter.

I hook up out-of-work Soviet scientists

with rogue Soviet nations.

I have problems

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