Don't Be a Menace to South Central Page #4

of another race!

- Word.

- Oh, yeah. Remind me

to pick my laundry up...

from that chink muthafucka

up the street.

Crazy Legs used

to be the best dancer in the hood.

But now he's paralyzed from

the waist down after a drive-by.

What's up, Crazy?

Hey, what's up, y'all? I be right

there, all right?

Whoo!

- That's the way to start the day.

How you doin'?

- Hi, Crazy.

-Hi, yourself. How's my little partner?

-Hello, little pygmy brother.

- All right, African brother.

- Hey, hold that.

Loc Dog didn't

have the flyest ride in the hood,

but it was reliable

in rain, sleet or snow.

Hey, you guys.

Y'all want to see a dead body?

- Yeah! Of course.

- Come on.

- I told you he was dead.

- Man, he stinks!

- What's up, baby boy?

- Hey, where you goin', girl?

Damn! Hey, Tray, if you can't

get nothin' up in here,

- you gonna straight die a virgin.

- Sh*t, man.

Hey, y'all. Look at them

freaks gettin' busy on the dance floor.

There's all kinds

of b*tches here!

What did I tell you about disrespectin'

my Nubian princesses?

- Aw, come on!

- Quit disrespect-- You need--

Oh, my God. The mother of Mecca

is right here before me.

Do my eyes not deceive me...

or am I lookin'

at the goddess lsis herself?

Can you, uh--

Can you do me a favor,

my brown-skinned angel?

Can you tap that white girl for me?

My milk of magnesia. Ohh!

Oh. After the devil made you

he broke the mold.

But maybe you and I could, uh,

make a little jungle fever?

Hey, this one to all my dead homies,

you know what I'm sayin'?

I remember the first time I saw Dashiki.

She was fine enough

to be Jet beauty of the week.

- Yo! Yo, yo, Loc. Loc, come here.

- What's up, n*gger?

- Yo, man. Who's this

fine girl over here?

Oh, n*gger, that's Dashiki.

Stay away from there. Everybody

in the hood's been up with her.

Shoot. She got more kids

than Mrs. Wayans.

- Damn!

- Yeah.

Anyway, that's Toothpick's ex-girl. You

don't want any of that boy's old scraps.

- Toothpick

got used to bein' in jail.

- Damn!

So much so that even on the outside, he

lived like he was still on the inside.

Gimme a knife, boy.

Keep it down. Keep it down.

Hmm? Bone check, homey.

Bone check!

Five dollars a head!

Five dollars.

- I got top!

- Go fish!

- What they in for, man?

- Five dollars, buster!

Oh, I got that.

I can cover that.

Here. Here you go.

What?

Oh, my money ain't good?

Do you know how many

crumb cakes I can get for that?

How many chocolate milks?

How many bars of soap?

Deal my cards! Just hurry up and

deal my cards. Deal, deal, deal!

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