
Daffy Duck's Quackbusters
"And then, Nose-man takes the ax...
...and chops his way into the city's
inner sanctum. "
And then what? Then what?
Ah! Here it is. Nose-man says:
"This place is malodorous.
Chock full of malignancies. "
Gads, this comic's a real page-turner.
It's slopping over with gripping suspense.
Let's see now, let's see. Nosey says:
"Do my nostrils detect
the overpowering stench...
...of a prehistoric monster?"
Smogzilla.
"Story continued in Hideous Tales
Issue Number 177."
Gee, that's nice.
"Story continued in Hideous Tales 177"?
Where is it? Where is it?
It's a veritable collector's item.
- Quick, you're on in five seconds.
- What? Who? Where? Huh?
Gee, tough audience.
Hm.
Take it, Ghoulie.
They're drenched in blood
Or caked with mud
You yell and scream
When one of them arrives
There is no denying
Monsters lead such interesting lives
They live in ooze
They've paid their dues
No brothers, sisters
Moms or dads or wives
Honest, I'm not lying
Monsters lead such interesting lives
When you see them
Coming down the street
You better not have weights
Tied to your feet
They'll steal your heart
Tear you apart
Limb from limb
On a whim they'll suck your brains
And eat your remains
They'll slice you up
They're never merry
They're oh so scary
Monsters lead such interesting lives
They're independent fellas
They don't live nine-to-fives
Monsters lead such interesting lives
Thank you. Thank you.
So are you folks enjoying yourselves?
Hi, Frankie. How's the missus?
Look, it's mummy dearest.
Still all wrapped up in yourself, I see.
And... Whoa, it appears
we have a celebrity in our midst.
That 22-ton terror of Tokyo town...
...that towering colossus
Of course, I'm talking about...
Throw a spot on him, would you, fellas?
Smogzilla!
So, Smog baby,
leveled any major cities lately?
You know, folks,
Smogzilla's just like any unemployed actor.
Except that when he pounds
the pavement...
...it registers a 10 on the Richter scale.
Aw. What's the matter?
The public not buying
those cheap special effects anymore?
Whew. A dream. It was all a dream.
Heh-heh-heh. Smogzilla.
You was expecting
maybe Calvin Coolidge?
Right this way, folks. Right this way.
It's a bargain at any price.
Step right up and get yourself
a brand-new DeLorean.
No household should be without one.
Just $60,000
in three easy weekly installments.
are selling like hotcakes.
Plus, there's a free six-pack
of ice-cold Billy Beer with every purchase.
They're sturdy, they're dependable,
they're factory fresh.
They're... They're... Hm.
Slightly used. They're...
Sticky Glue.
So strong it can suspend this cow
from an iron girder.
And so easy to use.
and forefinger...
...gently squeeze, and...
And it really sticks.
Like that there.
I represent the Excelsior Appliance
and Appurtenance Company...
...with a complete line
of household appliances and appurt...
- Is the lady of the house in?
- No!
Here you are, folks.
My company has authorized me to offer,
at slashed prices...
...this complete line of laugh provokers.
The little gem flower squirter.
Now, don't crowd. Don't crowd.
Well, isn't anybody gonna crowd?
Anybody?
How about a Joe Miller joke book?
Laughs galore.
Ajax rib-tickler, ma'am.
Amuse your boyfriend.
It's used like a...
It's nice.
Special price
on Chicken Inspector badge, sir.
It's only 13 cents.
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"Daffy Duck's Quackbusters" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2023. Web. 21 Mar. 2023. <https://www.scripts.com/script/daffy_duck's_quackbusters_6232>.
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