August: Osage County

1

"Life is very long."

T.S. Eliot.

Not the first person to say it,

certainly not the first person

to think it,

but he's given credit for it

because he bothered to write it down.

Now, if you say it, you have

to say his name after it.

"Life is very long."

T.S. Eliot.

Absolutely goddamn right.

Violet...

...my wife.

She takes pills.

Sometimes a great many.

Facts are,

my wife takes pills and I drink,

that's the bargain we've struck.

A little paragraph

in our marriage contract.

So rather than once more

vow abstinence with

my fingers crossed,

I have chosen to turn my life

over to a higher power

and join the ranks

of the hiring class.

It's not a decision with which

I'm entirely comfortable.

I mean, I know how to launder

my dirty undies.

Done it all my life.

But I'm finding

that it's getting in the way

of my drinking.

Bev!

Yes?

Did...

...you...

Oh, goddamn it!

Are the police here?

Could you come here?

Whoa.

Oh, hello.

This is Johnna, the young

woman I told you about.

You tell me she's a woman.

Woman. Woman.

Whoa, man.

That I'm hiring.

Oh, you hire women's

now the thing.

I thought you meant

the other woman.

To cook and clean,

carry you to the clinic.

Hello.

- Hello.

- I'm sorry.

- Like this.

- Yes, ma'am.

You're very pretty.

Thank you.

Are you an Injun?

Yes, ma'am.

What kind?

Cheyenne.

Hmm.

You think I'm pretty?

Like this?

Like...

Careful, careful, care...

I'm sorry. I took some...

...medicine for my mu...

...for my mu...

...my muscular...

...for my muscular...

Why don't you go back to bed,

sweetheart?

Why don't you go f***

a f***ing sow's ass?!

All right.

I'm sorry.

I'll be... sickly sweet.

Sickly sweet.

I'm so... sweet.

I'm so... in love.

Sweet.

We keep unusual hours here.

My wife's been diagnosed

with a touch of cancer,

and she'll need

to be driven down to Tulsa

for her final

chemotherapy treatments.

What kind of cancer?

Oh, my God, I nearly

neglected the punch line.

Mouth cancer.

Do you have any questions?

Um, what pills does she take?

Oh, Valium, Vicodin.

Uh, Darvon, Darvocet,

Percodan, Percocet,

uh, Xanax for fun.

OxyContin in a pinch.

And, of course, Dilaudid.

I can't forget Dilaudid.

My last refuge, my books.

Simple pleasures.

Like finding wild onions

by the side of the road,

or requited love.

Oh, here. Here.

T.S. Eliot.

Read it or not.

It's not a job requirement,

just for your own enjoyment.

"Here we go round the prickly pear.

Prickly pear, prickly pear.

Here we go round the prickly pear."

Mom?

Mom!

Mom?

Mom?

Mom?

You didn't hear the phone?

If it's your father,

tell him to f*** off.

It's Aunt Ivy, from Oklahoma.

...and all of Denver County.

Here's JD & the Straight Shot.

Ivy.

What's wrong?

When?

Right here on your KZLY.

It's another hot day

on the plains in Osage County.

Highs in the 90's

all over Oklahoma.

And here's a good one from...

- What'd you tell Barb?

- I told her Dad was missing.

- What'd she say?

- She's on her way.

Goddamn your father

for putting me through this.

Did you see that office of his?

And then he hired this Injun

for some goddamn reason.

Now I have a stranger

living in my house.

What is her name?

- Johnna.

- Hmm.

I can't handle this all by myself.

I called Karen.

Oh.

Yeah. What'd she say?

She said she'd try to get here.

Oh, she'd be a big, fat help.

Just like you.

Well... I need Barb.

What's Barb gonna be

able to do about it?

What'd you do to your hair?

I had it straightened.

Why would anybody do that?

Just wanted a change.

You're a pretty girl.

Why don't you wear makeup?

Do I need makeup?

Every woman needs makeup.

Don't let anybody

tell you different.

The only woman pretty enough to go

without makeup was Elizabeth Taylor,

and she wore a ton.

Shoulders are all slumped and your

hair's straightened, don't wear makeup.

You look like a lesbian.

- Mom.

- You could get a decent man

if you would just spruce up a bit.

That's all I'm saying.

I'm not looking for a man.

- How many was that?

- Wasn't counting.

Is your mouth burning?

Like a son of a b*tch.

My tongue is on fire.

You supposed to be smoking?

Is anybody "supposed" to smoke?

Are you scared?

Of course I'm scared.

You are a comfort to me,

sweetheart.

Thank God one of my girls

stayed close to home.

In my day...

...families stayed together.

Aunt Mattie Fae's here.

She means to come in here

and tell me what's what.

I don't know how Uncle Charlie

puts up with it.

He smokes a lot of grass.

He does?

He smokes a lot of grass.

I told Vi, "You take all those

goddamn books he's so fond of

and make a big pile in the front yard

and have yourself a bonfire."

Well, you don't burn a man's books.

You do if the situation calls for it.

The man's books didn't do anything.

You get any ideas about just up

and taking off, Charlie Aiken,

- you better believe I will have your...

- I'm not going anywhere.

I'm saying if you did.

I will give you two days

to get your head straight,

then it's all going up

in a blaze of glory.

Not that you got any books lying around.

I don't think I've ever seen you

read a book in my life.

That bother you?

What's the last book you read?

Well, Beverly was a teacher,

and teachers read books.

- I'm in the upholstery business.

- Oh, sweetheart.

Your daddy's done this before.

Just takes off, no call, nothing.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes