A Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy Page #6

Synopsis: Centred around a weekend party at the home of inventor Andrew Hobbs and his wife Adrian, attended by randy doctor Maxwell Jordan, his nurse Dulcy, renowned philosopher Dr.Leopold Sturgis and his fiancée, this is a light comedy concerning their various emotional, intellectual and sexual entanglements, loosely based on Ingmar Bergman's 'Smiles of a Summer Night' .
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Woody Allen
Production: Warner Bros.
  1 nomination.
 
IMDB:
6.7
Metacritic:
51
Rotten Tomatoes:
75%
PG
Year:
1982
88 min
715 Views


This is why I didn't tell you. If things were

OK between us, this wouldn't bother you.

But you're so vulnerable,

and they'll be here all weekend,

- and we don't sleep together any more...

- Oh! Not so loud.

- And she's so beautiful...

- Oh...

That's a simple fact.

A blind man could see that.

Adrian, I love you. I was never in love with

Ariel Weymouth and I don't love her now.

Hey, trust me.

(Maxwell)

So how did you and Leopold meet?

(Ariel) We were both tourists

at St Peter's in Rome.

(Maxwell) You picked her up

at the Vatican?

(Ariel) My whole life I wanted

to see the Sistine Chapel ceiling.

(Leopold) I met her in

the basilica before a madonna.

I couldn't resist the impulse

to speak to this heavenly creature.

(Ariel) Leopold's an expert on Italian art.

(Leopold) I had the privilege of escorting

Ariel through the Sistine Chapel

and explaining to her exactly why

Michelangelo's ceiling was indeed great.

(Ariel) When Raphael first

laid eyes on it, he fainted.

(Maxwell) Had he eaten?

(Mendelssohn's

"Violin Concerto in E Minor")

- To summer.

- To summer

(Leopold) "The spring, the summer,

The childing autumn,

angry winter, change

Their wonted liveries."

OK. Try something else.

- Got it.

- Can I stop now?

Do you remember these woods at all?

Do you remember the bridge down there?

Of course. It was one of the most

beautiful summer nights I'd ever seen.

It was very romantic.

I think about that night all the time.

- No, really?

- Yeah.

And when I do, I want to kill you.

Kill you or myself, but much more you.

What for?

Do you have any idea

how much I lusted after you?

Why didn't you do something?

I wanted you to.

You were this diplomat's daughter,

raised by nuns.

I was shy. We were not in love.

It was pure animal lust.

- That's just what I was in the mood for.

- I know. I missed an opportunity.

I've regretted it ever since.

That's the saddest thing in life,

a missed opportunity.

And particularly rotten in this case

because after you left,

a month after you went to Europe,

I learned that you were, and had been,

sleeping with everyone. Everyone!

Not everyone.

Well, maybe it was everyone.

I wouldn't have been the first,

I'd have been the 21st.

Writers, bankers, poets, the entire

infield of the Chicago White Sox.

You have to admit, I wasn't one of

your shrinking, mousy, inhibited virgins.

- The understatement of the century.

- Did you want me to take charge?

- You didn't act like you wanted anything.

- I was used to slower women.

Adrian and I had no sex

till we were married.

Why are we rehashing all this? Huh?

It's over. We're two older people now.

By tomorrow this time, I'll be married too.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes

Woody Allen

Heywood "Woody" Allen is an American actor, comedian, filmmaker, and playwright, whose career spans more than six decades. more…

All Woody Allen scripts | Woody Allen Scripts

3 fans

Submitted on August 05, 2018

Discuss this script with the community:

0 Comments

    Translation

    Translate and read this script in other languages:

    Select another language:

    • - Select -
    • 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
    • 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
    • Español (Spanish)
    • Esperanto (Esperanto)
    • 日本語 (Japanese)
    • Português (Portuguese)
    • Deutsch (German)
    • العربية (Arabic)
    • Français (French)
    • Русский (Russian)
    • ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
    • 한국어 (Korean)
    • עברית (Hebrew)
    • Gaeilge (Irish)
    • Українська (Ukrainian)
    • اردو (Urdu)
    • Magyar (Hungarian)
    • मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
    • Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Italiano (Italian)
    • தமிழ் (Tamil)
    • Türkçe (Turkish)
    • తెలుగు (Telugu)
    • ภาษาไทย (Thai)
    • Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
    • Čeština (Czech)
    • Polski (Polish)
    • Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Românește (Romanian)
    • Nederlands (Dutch)
    • Ελληνικά (Greek)
    • Latinum (Latin)
    • Svenska (Swedish)
    • Dansk (Danish)
    • Suomi (Finnish)
    • فارسی (Persian)
    • ייִדיש (Yiddish)
    • հայերեն (Armenian)
    • Norsk (Norwegian)
    • English (English)

    Citation

    Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:

    Style:MLAChicagoAPA

    "A Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 15 Jun 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/a_midsummer_night's_sex_comedy_13753>.

    We need you!

    Help us build the largest writers community and scripts collection on the web!

    Watch the movie trailer

    A Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy

    Browse Scripts.com

    The Studio:

    ScreenWriting Tool

    Write your screenplay and focus on the story with many helpful features.