A Child's Christmases in Wales Page #4

Synopsis: Young Owen recalls how, at Christmas 1983 when he was ten, his obsessively tidy mother and penny-pinching father hosted his two paternal uncles, garrulous carpet king Huw, perpetually attacking his ex-wife and with silent son Maurice in tow, and shambling out-of-it Gorwel. Huw brings a series of computer games, none of which work, whilst Mum steps on the Subbuteo set. Three years later and the annoying neighbors the Cadwallander boys are still charging the earth for their carol-singing, and Huw is still bitter about his ex-wife, but his gift of an artificial Christmas tree causes Mum to junk their real one. The uncles fall out over a game of Hungry Hippos and Huw's tree goes up in smoke, prompting the return of the real one. By 1989 the family has a phone and a color television. Huw brags that he fitted Tom Jones' new carpet and the Cadwallander boys have a CD out, but Gorwel gets into a fight trying to move them on. At least he wins his bet that it will be a white Christmas, though th
 
IMDB:
7.7
Year:
2009
59 min
102 Views


Getting closer to the full set.

Fantastic!

Thanks, Dad!

Yes, and while we wait ten years

for that to be set up,

welcome to the future.

What on earth is that

when it's at home?

This is the Sinclair Spectrum ZX.

This is the greatest computer of all-time.

What do you do with it?

You play games with it, that's what!

This is the big thing now. Look at him.

He's been wanting

one of these all year.

He's beside himself.

Anyway... I've got a load of games

to go with it.

There's Sublime Soccer.

We've got Mind-blowing Golf Challenge 3,

Space Invaders,

More Space Invaders,

Space Invaders Are Back,

Space Invaders Return Once More...

Persistent, aren't they,

the old Space Invaders?

Planning Permission.

"You get to play a civil servant.

"You'll have to read applications,

"process paperwork and make decisions

which will shape the future of your town."

Let's get this cranked up, shall we?

Hey, I was watching that!

- Sorry, what was it?

- Brookside on Channel 4.

Ah, I heard that most people

who watch Channel 4

are Marxist and homosexual.

What's it about, this Brooks/lie?

It's about a group of people

living in Liverpool

having all these problems.

You can see that any time. Let's get

the old Spectrum set up, then, eh?

Get ready to see the future.

Does it always take this long?

No. There must be wrong with

the speed of your television.

'Ere you are! It's doing something now.

Good! Come on!

Come on... Right!

OK, it's obviously a faulty tape.

Let's try Ultimate Fishing.

Right, then, while we're waiting,

shall we crack on with the game?

- Have we got two players?

- Stay where you are, Maurice.

Can't we just have a quick game,

and then...

then we'll go straight back

to the computer?

I will sue them for every penny.

They'll rue the day...

God help them if they ever

come to me for a carpet!

Right, then, Subbuteo.

How it's played is this,

you get 11 players each...

Mum!

You've got your five players each.

- Oh, Brenda!

- Well, who put those down there?

Little men on the floor.

What are we, the South Wales' Toys

and Collectibles Museum? Madhouse!

Psst!

I've still got that ball.

Arr...

Hm! Nice to hear them

having fun, isn't it?

Sometimes it's the simple things, eh?

Oh, my God! The computer's working!

Maurice!

Maurice!

Maurice, come in here

and play Planning Permission.

I think they're happy with the ball, Huw.

All right, I'll play, then.

I'll play the flippin' thing!

Press X to be

the local council official,

or Y to start off as the secretary.

X.

God rest you merry, gentlemen

Let nothing you dismay

Remember Christ our Saviour...

Christmas 1986,

and quite a lot had changed in our

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Mark Watson

Mark Andrew Watson (born 13 February 1980) is a British comedian and novelist. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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