'8 Out of 10 Cats' Does 'Deal or No Deal' Page #3

---

We're hoping for blue here.

GROANING:

20,000 gone.

Interestingly, that's how much you

owe me for cleaning, as well.

That's painful, isn't it?

Shall we see what

the banker has to say?

Shall we see what Brian thinks?

You're trying to demystify him

by calling him Brian.

Yes. It's like Voldemort.

PHONE RINGS:

Oh, one-nil to you, Brian!

LAUGHTER:

Hello, Brian.

Seven years you've chatted

to no-one but Noel Edmonds,

you poor, poor man.

It's like the Bat Phone, isn't it?

The Penguin has taken over.

His job as the banker

on Deal Or No Deal

is to get inside people's heads.

Sean, you're not worried about.

He's easy to read,

predictable, one level.

A lot of people have made

that mistake in the past.

Brian.

Show business is littered

with fools like you.

You're worried about Jon.

Jon, he saying you're "formidable".

Touche, Brian.

Smart, meticulous, circumspect.

No, I'm not.

All of your offers

are going to be aimed at Jon.

I've never been treated like this...

by an imaginary person in my life.

It's not an imaginary person, it's

the banker I've got on the phone.

Why can't I hear the background

noise of Spearmint Rhino?

LAUGHTER:

The opening offer, Jon...

He's trying to get inside your head

by getting inside mine.

That's what they're trying to do.

He's part of the whole plan.

Shut up, woman!

The opening offer is 6,500.

APPLAUSE:

6,500.

You have to agree

on all these decisions.

You can pick the boxes individually

but you have to agree

on these big decisions.

I think it's clear

at the moment, isn't it?

You don't step away from that board.

OK, 6,500.

Deal or no deal?

- No. - Deal.

APPLAUSE:

Jon, what are you

planning on doing?

Are you going with his system

or are you going to go rogue?

Three boxes to open.

I don't like the pressure.

Have a move around.

I mean, where are you drawn to?

Where do you think the money is?

What would you pick now?

LAUGHTER:

Guys, I know I didn't

come on that weird

Brokeback Mountain trip with you...

but that's because I had a nightmare

about a moment like this.

You are about to find out

what we learnt.

LAUGHING:

What would you want to go with?

That was Sean's system.

What are you going to go for?

It's working now, isn't it?

It's not really working.

That's an OK board.

We've got the power five, Jimmy.

I've turned into a Deal person!

LAUGHTER:

How did this happen?

The power five are there, yes,

but look how many reds

you're missing now.

So I'm going off system.

Are you?

(AUDIENCE) Oooh!

They are not happy

about you going off system.

He's his own man.

He's got to go with his own...

I'm not my own man!

Why would you go off system?

Jon, imagine me and you

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes