Zelig Page #2

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should be limited to women.

It's not that he was

making any sense at all.

It was a conglomeration

of psychological double-talk...

that he had apparently heard...

or was familiar with

through reading.

The funny thing was

his delivery was quite fluid...

and might have been

convincing...

to someone

who did not know any better.

Who was this Leonard Zelig

that seemed to create...

such diverse impressions

everywhere?

All that was known of him

was that he was the son...

of a Yiddish actor

named Morris Zelig...

whose performance as Puck...

in the Orthodox version of

"A Midsummer Night's Dream"...

was coolly received.

The elder Zelig's

second marriage...

is marked by constant violent

quarreling, so much so...

that although the family

lives over a bowling alley...

it's the bowling alley

that complains of noise.

As a boy, Leonard is frequently

bullied by anti-Semites.

His parents,

who never take his part...

and blame him for everything,

side with the anti-Semites.

They punish him often

by locking him in a dark closet.

When they are really angry...

they get into the closet

with him.

On his deathbed,

Morris Zelig tells his son...

that life is a meaningless

nightmare of suffering...

and the only advice he gives him

is to save string.

Though brother Jack

has a nervous breakdown...

and sister Ruth becomes

a shoplifter and alcoholic...

Leonard Zelig appears

to have adjusted to life.

Somehow, he seems to have coped.

And then, suddenly,

increasingly strange behavior.

Fascinated

by the Zelig phenomenon...

Dr. Fletcher arranges

a series of experiments...

and invites the skeptical staff

to observe.

With the doctors watching, Zelig

becomes a perfect psychiatrist.

When two Frenchmen

are brought in...

Zelig assumes their characters

and speaks reasonable French.

In the company

of a Chinese person...

he begins to develop

Oriental features.

By now, word has gotten out

to the press...

and the public, thirsting

for thrills and novelty...

is immediately captivated.

The clamor is so great...

that Dr. Allan Sindell

is forced to issue a statement.

We're beginning

to realize the dimensions...

of what could be the scientific

medical phenomenon of the age...

and possibly of all time.

Fresh stories roll off

the press every day...

about Zelig

and his puzzling condition.

Although the doctors claim

to have the situation in hand...

no two can agree

on a diagnosis.

I'm convinced

it's glandular in nature...

and although there's

no evidence of misfunction...

further tests will show

a problem in the secretions.

It's something he picked up

from eating Mexican food.

This manifestation

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