You Can't Have It Page #2

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we're gonna play darts,

we're gonna drink beer like men.

Come on, what do you say?

One last Mr. Phil's dart

game, what do you say?

Last game, you never

even had a first game.

Well maybe I'm trying to branch out.

God damn it, I wish

he would come play with...

Me too.

I would ride him like a donkey.

I bet he's hung like a horse.

Only one way to know.

You got that right.

I think I should go be with my husband.

Yeah, see ya.

Hey, girls.

Can I have a ginger ale please, Jackie?

Sure, coming right up.

Ooh, that sounds good,

can I have one too?

You got it.

Can you put some rum in mine?

Well actually, can you

put a lot of rum in mine?

Maybe some Jim, some whisky.

Hey, it's your funeral Karen.

Anything extra for you, Sandra?

Not quite yet, we'll wait a

little while before we start.

You guys wanna open a tab?

Happy hour for another 15 minutes.

Yeah, why do they call it happy hour?

I mean, that doesn't make any sense.

Shouldn't like every hour be happy hour?

Well you both look hot tonight,

let's just say you should be happy.

Ugh God, look Sandra,

Tammy's gonna leave any second.

I hope so, I need to talk to him.

You know who you should wanna talk to?

Tyler, god he is just perfection.

Look at him, he's so big.

Oh yeah, then there's Bill who's Bill.

Well Bill has his charms,

besides Jackie's in love

with Tyler, so.

Oh, love is definitely not

the word I would have used.

Well you better get up on that,

because that dick is mine.

You better turn your

attention elsewhere.

Who's your runner up?

Aw, Craig, you could be his one

and only doll for the night.

Hey, I don't know, where is he?

You may wanna find the nearest mirror.

Oh my God, wow, such a b*tch.

I'm just kidding, he

usually goes to the gym

before he gets here, so he

should be walking in any minute.

See, consistency, that's

a good trait for a man.

No, predictability, no way.

What?

Oh nothing, I just didn't

know you knew a word that big.

That's good.

It's all about concentration.

Is that all you got?

Okay, I'll eat my words, but watch this.

Too many people living in this world

Wonder what's gonna kill them all

I made it on the board.

I don't think that counts.

Ooh.

Not bad at all.

That was pretty good.

So, what the doctor say?

If you came with me you would know.

Come on, don't start this again.

I know, I'm sorry.

The doctor said that there's

no problem with your parts.

Some couples just can't conceive.

Okay, so what do we do now?

Well we're not entirely out of options,

we can keep trying, we can

adopt, we can get a surrogate.

Surrogacy, I get to

have sex with her, right?

Yeah.

And medically she's required to be

a 19 year old cheerleader.

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