Unaccompanied Minors Page #2

I know you're worried about the kids.

They're fine.

It's Christmas Eve.

We're gonna do more decorating...

No. No. Judy, you don't have

any more decorating to do.

I have to finish. I have six more boxes

of lights in the garage.

- This is creepy.

- You're just poisonous, aren't you?

Thanks for being such a great sister.

The Weather Service is calling it

the Storm of the Century.

It's the biggest blizzard to hit

the middle of the country in decades.

We're talking nasty.

It's already grounded all flights

in and out of the Midwest...

Oh, no! The kids!

Can we change planes now?

Okay, yeah, I can do this. All right.

- Kids love me. I'm all right. I'm good.

- Excuse me, sir?

Didn't I tell you this was fun?

Look how many kids are here.

Get us out of here.

Why would you wanna do that?

It's great down here.

Look, watch this. Hey, can I get

you guys' attention, please?

Okay.

All right, accidents happen.

All right, that one was full!

Straw in the eye. Straw in the eye.

Santa's watching!

He's not very happy about this!

- He's not going to come to your house!

- Amateurs.

- I bet he's psycho.

- I heard he tore a kid in half once.

- Go poke him.

- No, you go poke him.

We could call Mom.

Yeah, well, she wouldn't drive

Then let's call Dad.

Yeah, he wouldn't drive

four feet to get us.

Pardon me, do your parents

happen to be divorced?

- What?

- I'm Charlie Goldfinch.

I'm conducting a poll

about flying solo this time of year.

Being divorced is number one.

Being Jewish...

...and visiting your grandparents

is second.

And then there are the rich kids.

But they're not statistically significant.

- Oh, burn.

- Good times, you guys. All right.

Okay.

Her name's Grace Conrad.

I admire your taste.

She's way out of your league, but if

you talk to her, I'll admire your pluck.

So, what about you two?

Divorce or Judaism?

- It's really none of your business.

- Divorced? Me too.

Polls are a great way to learn about

your fellow man. Thank you for your time.

This place is weird.

Could be worse.

Okay, Simon says flush your cell phone.

Is this bathroom out of order?

No.

Must escape the sound of running water.

Read them and weep, boys.

Texas Hold 'Em. Excellent game.

- What, you play?

- Only all the time.

No, you don't.

Yeah, I do. She doesn't know

what she's talking about.

I play all the time and I win.

We think she's adopted.

You're adopted, underpants!

- Underpants.

- Nice jacket. Abercrombie?

Please. It's Dior.

Why? Is yours from A & F?

Our mom bought it for him at Kmart.

Yeah. I gotta take her to get some food.

Her blood sugar's low, right?

No! I wanna watch them play cards,

noodle-head!

Yeah. Let her watch, noodle-head.

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