The Death of Stalin Page #3

---

Polnikov?

STALIN:

You want to know where f***ing

Polnikov is? You want to GO there?

Malenkov knows he shouldn't have asked.

Beria puts his arm round Khrushchev.

BERIA:

I love that grenade story. Oh, is

there one in your pocket?

Khrushchev pulls a squashed tomato from his pocket. Beria and

the others laugh. Stalin too.

KHRUSHCHEV:

(laughs, camping it up)

I die for the Motherland!

MUSIC:
dramatic orchestral.

Under the music, everything slows down.

In slow motion, we see Khrushchev and Beria laughing at each

other, like two braying animals. Khrushchev tries to wipe his

hand on Beria's jacket, generating more laughter. We can just

hear, at a quarter of the speed, Beria and Khrushchev calling

each other 'Potato' and 'Tomato' but it sounds like grunts.

We see under Beria, the caption "Lavrenti BERIA. Head of

Security Forces". And under Khrushchev, his caption: "Nikita

KHRUSHCHEV, in charge of Agricultural Reform".

MUSIC OUT – Back to normal speed.

Malenkov takes another tomato from the table, desperate to be

in on the joke.

MALENKOV:

Take THIS, you bastards!

He mimes pulling a grenade pin from it with his teeth. Now

doesn’t know where to take the joke. Puts the tomato down.

MALENKOV (CONT’D)

Anyway...better get back to...

STALIN:

Time for a cowboy movie. Who’s in

my posse?

Everyone tries to look excited.

20 May 2016 Draft 10 7.

KHRUSHCHEV:

Oh good, it's Stagecoach again.

MOLOTOV:

Yee-hah!

17 INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM - NIGHT 17

The orchestra are on stage. Half the audience remain.

Security guards are at each door. Andreyev at the front of

the stage. Maria is nearby at the piano.

SERGEI:

Half the audience have gone. The

acoustic will be very dry.

ANDREYEV:

Pull people in off the streets! Fat

ones, so we won’t need so many!

MUSICIAN 1, the orchestra’s joker, asserts himself.

MUSICIAN 1

I could call my wife? She’d...

(indicates “fat”)

...”dampen the acoustic”.

Laughter. Andreyev turns to the audience, trying to smile.

ANDREYEV:

Comrades!

A TRUMPETER plays a quick fanfare, prompting laughter.

ANDREYEV (CONT’D)

Comrades, shut up! I have great

news! Wonderful news.

MUSICIAN 1

(to Andreyev)

Are you pregnant?

The trumpeter parps. More laughter.

ANDREYEV:

Comrade Stalin...

(shoots a look)

...loved tonight's concerto and

would like a recording of it right

away which we don't have for some

reason and trust me we will look

into why that happened, but

meanwhile... the concerto we just

played will be played by us

again... Now. Please. We will

record it and applaud it.

20 May 2016 Draft 10 8.

Rate this script:5.0 / 1 vote