Special Correspondents Page #2

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- It's what I love.

Yeah, but it's just not very exciting.

- You're joking.

- No, I'm not joking. But go on, tell me.

What is the most exciting thing

that's happened this week?

- Okay. Um...

- Okay.

- Well, you decide.

- Okay.

Is it that our omnibus podcast

just made top 50 on iTunes?

Ooh.

Or, is it that Jamie Oliver

popped in yesterday

- to talk to Stig Arnold about fat kids?

- Is he gonna be here?

- Stig's never missed a party yet. Heh.

- I meant Jamie Oliver.

Who knows?

- So, no, then?

- No. Definitely not.

- [sighs]

- You meet Stig.

You won't want to see Jamie Oliver

after you've met Stig.

[sighs]

Sorry.

[Eleanor sighs]

Haven't you ever wanted to do

something extraordinary?

- [Mallard] Finch.

- Hi.

Um, this is Geoffrey Mallard,

the radio boss.

- This is my wife, Eleanor.

- Pleasure to meet you.

I've been looking for you.

Some lunatic took his family hostage.

He's armed. I need you and Claire

to go and cover it.

- Now?

- Yeah, I don't have a choice.

You're the only guy around.

- Where is Claire?

- She's on her way here. Nice to meet you.

Okay, I'm so sorry, darling.

No, no, no, you're not leaving me here.

I don't know anyone.

I don't have a choice. He said

I'm the only guy that can do this.

- He said you're the only guy around.

- He didn't literally mean

I'm the only guy around. He meant

I'm the only guy around that can do this.

- He's around, he couldn't do it.

- You don't know that.

- Oh, come on. Look at him.

- You can't do this to me. Come on.

- Shh.

- "Shh!"

No. You know what? Forget it.

I'm going home.

Please don't. Don't, please.

Just wait here and enjoy yourself

and I'll whiz back,

and then we'll have a...

- You're gonna be gone for hours.

- No.

In these situations the police usually get

the gunman to the window really quickly

and shoot him through the top lip,

and that takes out the brain stem,

so there's no reflex... action.

- Hi.

- Did you see Mallard?

Yeah. Oh, uh, this is Claire Maddox.

This is my wife, Eleanor.

- Nice to meet you.

- Yeah.

- We should go.

- Yeah.

- See you in the lobby.

- Yeah, okay.

[Frank] Who's this? Is this Tony?

Look at this guy.

- [Finch] Anyway...

- [Frank] How are you?

- [Finch] I've gotta go.

- Okay, fine, go.

- Yeah?

- Whatever.

You'll be all right?

- I'll see you soon. Okay.

- Okay, go if you're gonna go.

- [woman] Hey, Frank.

- Hey.

- Hi.

- [Claire] Hey.

Did you see Frank arrive,

acting like he thinks he's James Bond?

Yeah. I think he's really cool.

He doesn't care about anything.

- [elevator bell dings]

- Oh.

- How is that cool?

- Hi.

- Hi.

- [Finch] Oh...

I don't know, I just...

- I just mean...

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